Big Love
Take Me As I Am

Episode Report Card
M. Giant: B+ | 2 USERS: A+
YOU GRADE IT
Daughter Of Bridezilla

Ben and Sarah sit at their table miserably as Sarah wonders why Sun Valley is so bad. I can't speak to Sun Valley specifically, but I can say that if my grandmother had remarried when I was sixteen and I was about to get dragged along on her honeymoon, I probably would have offered to go to a teen boot camp instead. Sarah tries to reminisce with Ben about when it was still just the four of them, and they went to a horse farm with Nancy. Ben pretends not to remember. Poorly.

Barb stands by the gift table, a soft smile on her face as she watches all of her horrible relatives dancing to Neil Diamond. Pretty racy tune for this crowd. Bill comes up and asks if she's telling people she's leaving. Barb says no. Bill asks if she wants him there. "Do you want to be here?" Barb non-answers. "I wouldn't have thrown your family away if it were my choice," Bill says, which actually gets through to Barb. They kiss. Well, there goes Nancy's cover story. Speaking of whom, Barb sees her mom standing by a pillar next to Cousin Howard, and goes over to join her when Howard leaves. A slow song starts up. Bill heads over to the table where Ben and Sarah are sitting, and asks his daughter to dance. Sarah smiles sweetly at the dorkiness of it all, and accepts his hand out onto the dance floor. He tells her that she can confide in him about anything. "I might actually surprise you." He's doing pretty well until he drops the platitude about how any guy who can't see how special she is doesn't deserve her. And in that way Sarah has of telling her parents incredibly heartbreaking things in such a sincere fashion that they can't possibly get mad at her, Sarah gently asks, "How can you expect me to take you seriously? Do you realize that you have no credibility? There's nothing that you can say to me about relationships, or life, that I will ever, ever listen to." Bill doesn't know what to say to that, so he falls back on, "Wave to your mother." Sarah obeys. Well, that's something, at least. Hopefully he can gradually work his way up to more ambitious commands, like "ignore me" and "say something painful."

Standing next to her own mom, Barb happily returns Sarah's wave, smiling bigger than she has all afternoon. So of course this is right when Wayne tugs on her sleeve and says, "Mother would like to have a visit with you and Dad in the front driveway." Barb excuses herself. It's not clear that Nancy knows who Wayne is, but she might be about to figure it out.

Nicki actually has the nerve to look pissed as she waits out front, with Margene standing next to her. And now we see that Margene should have listened to Nicki and stayed in the car, because while her hair and makeup look great, her dress? Oh, dear, no. Nicki demands of Barb, "Are you leaving us again?" Barb says they're overreacting (always a self-fulfilling comment), and tells them to go home before they wreck her chances of reconciling with her mother. Margene's not buying it: "You trumped this all up because you're angry that I'm having dinner with Larry and Susie." Which doesn't even register on Barb's list of priorities right now. Nicki brings up the attempted kidnapping of Ben, and Margene piles on, saying, "You don't approve of Ben living the Principle, but what are we living, Barb?" Voices are getting raised, which is another way you can tell it's a TV wedding. Bill comes out, asking what's going on, followed by Ben and the other kids. Margene accuses Bill of always choosing Barb, and announces, "I like the Weber people. They are real people, and we're keeping it!" Poor Margene, having an argument that nobody else is having. Suddenly she and Nicki are on opposite sides, so Nicki tells Margene to hush, and Bill tells them both to go home. And then Nicki turns on Bill, saying Alby stopped by again. "Did you know about what the Greenes were going to do to my father? Did you put the Greenes up to shooting my father for Weber Gaming?" Angrily, Bill says, "Don't ever question me on that level again. It was business. I got stuck between them. And this discussion is over." In other words, "Kind of." He yells at them that they're all going ahead with Weber Gaming, together, "IN HARMONY!"

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Big Love

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