Big Love
The Happiest Girl

Episode Report Card
M. Giant: B- | 1 USERS: A+
My So-Called Wife

Bill and Barb say goodnight to the Paulsons, and then, holding hands, they decide to stop at Margene's table for some polite pleasantries before heading upstairs to their separate rooms. Margene, still playing the part of secretary, asks Bill if there's anything else. "Yes," Bill says. "Are you ready to go upstairs now?" At Bill's side, Barb's eyes widen and the table goes quiet. Bill apologizes to the guys for not introducing his wife, Barb. The men at the table stand up. "And of course you've met my other wife, Margene," Bill says. "Your other wife?" the tit-merchant smirks. Margene gets up and stands next to Bill, looking like every homely girl in every movie who ever got asked to the prom, in the sense that she's (a) thrilled, (b) flattered, and (c) not remotely homely. Barb, meanwhile, is wearing the smile of a woman who's just been impaled by a spear. Bill asks the clients about renewing their contract with Weber Gaming, now that he's named his vice, so to speak. After learning that Bill's got another one at home with the kids, the guys say they'll definitely be in touch, and they all say goodnight. Bill herds two-thirds of his harem out of the restaurant. He probably considers this a victory. Sure, he's just ambushed and pissed off one wife, but the other one is happy and so are his clients. It's not often he gets a majority like that.

Upstairs, Margene joins Barb in bed, wearing what you expect to wear to bed in the Honeymoon Suite: a short, pink, baby-doll nightie. It's quite hilariously inappropriate, but what else is she going to wear? It's not like she would have thought to pack some flannel PJs just in case the whole trip blew up and she ended up having to sleep with Barb. Which I'm sure is a mistake she won't make again. Also, how did they decide who got which side of the bed, since Bill always seems to sleep on the right? Barb's on that side now, by the way. Margene knows that Barb hated Bill's little display, but she found it exhilarating. "I thought it was sabotage," Barb quietly buzzkills. She just thinks things are going too fast. So move to a broadcast network, where the seasons are twice as long and you'd get to swear more. Margene makes Barb an offer: "Let me have Weber Gaming. You can have Home Plus. Let me be Bill's wife for Weber. You don't even like it. You know what? It isn't you." This makes just a bit too much sense for Barb to dismiss out of hand, but she looks appraisingly at her wedding ring, like she's wondering how much she can get for it.

At the TV studio, Rhonda waits on the set to sing her song. From where she's sitting, she can see into the control room, where Heather is talking to her mom in what looks like a fairly animated fashion. That's another jig up for Rhonda. But she keeps her cool, rather than rushing right in there and telling a bunch of lies like you'd expect. Maybe she's growing.

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Big Love




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