Big Love
The Writing On The Wall

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Back home, Sarah's got her hands full with the four boys when Barb comes in with bags of groceries for dinner. Barb complains about Margene's absence and starts drafting Sarah into helping with the meal, but her instructions are interrupted when Heather pops up out of nowhere. With a carton of eggs in one hand and a carton of strawberries in the other, Barb backs up against the refrigerator, like she's being shot at or something. Sarah says she has to take Heather home. Heather solicitously asks how Barb's doing. Sarah lectures Barb on "giving up your plans for Dad's anniversary with Nicki." Barb tells Heather that it's her anniversary, too. Heather's trying to be cool with it, saying it happens in "every kind of marriage." She sympathizes with how many people Barb has to take care of, but Barb insists that it's actually easier with more hands to help. Interesting theory. Even more interesting that Barb still buys into it after six years of practice. "I hope you find your AWOL sister-wife," Sarah says to Barb, practically dragging Heather out behind her. Barb just stands there wondering what just happened.

Bill is now doing just what he said he would do, which is standing under the defaced billboard with Don so they can be miserable together. Bill wonders how they can defend themselves "without dignifying the accusation." You mean the true accusation? The accurate and correct one? That's a puzzler, all right. Bill has half a mind to "go live on some abusive compound, say the hell with it." Uh, yeah, it's fine for the men, after all. He asks if Don thinks Bill's face should be on the billboard. "It's your store, Bill," Don shrugs. Bill pushes, and Don says they're vulnerable. Bill says he couldn't tell Barb about it, that Nicki's terrified and they forgot her anniversary, and that Ben saw the sign earlier. "This thing's coming down now," he declares, and they both hop into Bill's Gigantomobile. At first I thought Bill's next move was going to involve his truck's trailer hitch and a very long chain, but he has something a bit less dramatic in mind.

Nicki and Margene are just arriving at Juniper Creek. Margene has put on a dark shirt over her tank top, and as Nicki drives along the road, she spots a couple of female beekeepers. Of course all Margene sees are the black veils covering their entire heads, so God knows what she thinks is going on. Nothing sinister or weird about apiary, Margie. But here's something that fills the bill: a woman leads three kids at a dead run across a field and into an open cellar door, which she pulls shut behind them. Some kind of apocalypse drill, I assume. "A woman just ran into a big hole," Margene whispers conspiratorially to Nicki. Nicki just hands Margene a giant prairie skirt. As Margene struggles into it, she giggles, "This whole place looks like Mammy Yoakum." Nicki gently says, "I don't make fun of where you come from." And if memory serves, Margene comes from the mid-1980s, where they don't really have Mammy Yoakum references.

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Big Love

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