Big Love
Big Love

Episode Report Card
M. Giant: A- | 915 USERS: C+
YOU GRADE IT
Rescue, Religion, And Revenge

Bill has called Uncle Eddie into his office to try and shake him down for the cash he needs for the earnest money. Eddie likes the numbers, but if he's going to put up that kind of cash, he wants a percentage of the business. Fifteen percent, to be exact, and one wonders if he knows how much that particular number rankles Bill and why. Bill is in fact pretty offended by the counteroffer, gong so far as to call Eddie a jerk. As you do when you're asking someone for a large sum of money. "I'm not sure that I want to get involved in this revenge fantasy of yours for 6% [interest]," Eddie says. Bill doesn't exactly make a case that it isn't a revenge fantasy when he says, "The man humiliated my wife. You and I lived on the streets out of a van because of him. What part of a revenge fantasy doesn't appeal to you?…My grandfather -- your father --- went out in a car one night with Roman Grant and only one of them came back." That hits home. Eddie gets serious, and starts to leave. But then outside Bill's office he stops, admits he is very interested, and he wants fifteen percent. Bill watches Eddie walk away, and suddenly Don is standing next to him asking a lot of questions. "Still negotiating," Bill tells him shortly, and answers his cell phone. It's Margene: "Craving! I need pie. It's bad."

You know what else is bad? Bill. Because to satisfy his pregnant wife's craving, he goes for pie to the diner with Anna, the Serbian waitress. He sits down at the counter and asks her for strawberry rhubarb. She notices that he seems happier today, and he says it's because he's glad she's working. She tells him her schedule, and he makes a show of memorizing it. Which she for some reason doesn't find creepy at all. Bill ventures, "Do you like the work?" "Oh, yes, it's very stimulating," she says sarcastically. "Try again." Bill does, with a comment about the weather. That gambit works better, to my amazement. But I guess if you're flirting with someone, you don't want to start out by being all me, me, me, my three wives and 7.5 kids and my toxic revenge business deal to get back at my cult-leader father-in-law. At least, I don't. While she's handling the pie with her back turned to him, he takes off his wedding ring under the counter. It's not as involved a process as you might think. I understand that he can only wear one ring in public, but shouldn't it at least be three times the usual thickness? She's given him a slice of pie, but he apologetically says he needs the whole thing, to go. Should have mentioned that before. She gets one for him, as well as a lemon meringue and a blueberry. This is how some guys let a girl know they're interested in her, and this is how some guys end up telling the girl instead, "Soon I shall be very fat." Still, Anna seems to be receiving the former message. The sweet, romantic piano music on the soundtrack tries to tell us how skeezy this whole scene isn't.

Big Love

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