Big Love
Where There's A Will

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Will They Or Won't They?

We then switch to Benny, who's running laps at a local track. The track's nearly empty, save for Brynne waiting on the end of it. He jogs over and says hey, and she asks without preamble, "Why haven't you called back? Are you mad at me? What's the matter? You're not going to turn into one of those creeps who don't call, are you?" Oh my goodness, Brynne, you totally need to get to a library and read you some Judith Krantz, stat! She tells all about how to ensnare a man! Apparently it involves calling him "darling" every ten seconds and having a name like "Valentine," but seriously, even if you skip those steps, La Krantz has all the answers for handling new lovers with care.

Brynne's accusation that Benny ain't no nice guy hits Ben where he lives. He protests he'd never do that, and she plants one on him. Ben tries to shake her off with the whole "I'm all sweaty and gross" excuse, but Brynne's not having it. Soon they're necking. She grabs his hand and they both run, smiling, to a wall next to the stadium where they can make out in relative privacy.

Or where they're right in view of Margene and Nicki, who have come to fetch Ben in Barb's station wagon. Demonstrating uncanny instincts for untoward behavior, Nicki's head swivels around, and she fixes her giant aviator sunglasses on the mashing teens, inquiring angrily, "Is that Ben?" Margene wonders what they do. "This," Nicki says grimly right before she leans on the horn. Margene protests that Nicki needs to stop. Ben leaps away from Brynne as if she's radioactive. As he heads over, Nicki says sotto voce, "This is why mothers shouldn't work." Margene points out that they don't work. Nicki huffs, "Barb should be at home." Margene points out, "We're at home." How ironic that the one sister-wife to whom nobody wants to leave their kids is the only one who seems to really embrace the whole sister-wives-are-doing-it-for-each-other ethos.

Ben and Brynne come over and Margene brightly lies, "We told your mom we'd come to pick you up. She had tons of papers to grade." Ben awkwardly replies, "Uh...okay. Everybody, this is Brynne." Nicki takes the initiative to complete the introduction with a dry and unamused, "I'm Lucy. This is Ethel." Ben explains they're his neighbors. Margene asks in her same bouncy voice, "So where can we take you, Brynne?" and she gives Nicki an I-can't-wait-to-talk-to-you-about-this-later look.

The kids gets in the back and have to sit on the sod Margene's hauling home. Nicki makes things uncomfortable with "Watch out for grubs." That Nicki, she has the gift for setting people on edge for no good reason. Margene is still playing gracious hostess, and she says to Brynne, "I like your skirt! Target?" Brynne replies politely, "No, Gap." Ben then notices how very much alike Brynne's denim-miniskirted legs and Margene's denim-miniskirted legs look. Cue the strains of "My Not-Mom Has Got It Goin' On." And then the drive gets worse as both Ben's not-moms point out that really, he should introduce Brynne to his parents.

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Big Love

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