In the foreground, dangling from a chain, we see a gleaming pendant in the shape of a diamond that's made up of multiple diamonds, and then we push focus to Michael Vartan. Eeeee! I'm not going to pretend I don't find him both adorable and scorching. I...don't really have anything more to say about that; it just seemed relevant for some reason. ["Dude. Okay, first, the scorch of Vartan is always relevant; second, it's relevant because it's the only possible good reason to watch this show at all, period, full stop." -- Miss Alli] We learn that Vartan works for the pendant guy, and Vartan's belonged to the club ever since his Christmas bonus, for which he thanks Mr. DeBeers. But Vartan's moving too fast, as the guy says he hopes it won't be awkward running into each other at the club -- because he's canning him. Vartan is stunned, and asks if the board is going along; the guy says nobody knows yet, but once he presents his reorg plan, they won't have any choice. Um, I don't think that's actually how boards work, but I'm about to go on a rant here and I need to pace myself. Anyway, the guy is a totally unsympathetic douche about the whole thing, not even giving a reason before he blithely tells Vartan to try the shrimp and leaves. Okay, seriously, it's not like I really care about plot holes on a show this ridiculous, but this one...oy. As we'll soon learn, the guy is fucking Vartan's wife. Does it really seem like a good idea on any level to fire him? I mean, I'm no attorney, but couldn't that result in a -- what's the word I'm looking for -- CAREER-ENDING LAWSUIT? ["Yes." -- Miss Alli] "James Walker: Golden Boy, Amerimart Industries." After a moment, "Soon-to-be-Former" appears in front of "Golden Boy." That would get a "snerk" from me if I weren't still mad at you about "Fidelity Pharmaceuticals," chyron.
Episode Report CardCouch Baron: C+ | 561 USERS: C+
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