Birds of Prey
Nature Of The Beast

Episode Report Card
Daniel: B- | Grade It Now!
Sorry I Killed Your Mother. We're Still Buds, Right?

Dinah walks in and says the guy in the picture "looks creepy," which if I were Mitch Pileggi I'd take offence to; Dinah asks who he is, and Helena offers up "a shoplifter" in the supremely aggravating obviously lying way this show does, made only worse with Barbara sitting there looking completely gobsmacked as Helena explains that the guy steals shoes -- "Blahniks, Todds, very expensive shoes" -- and she vows to track him down, while the best Barbara can offer is that it was a slow night. Dinah, to her credit, seems to think they're acting weird but doesn't make an issue of it, and says she'll see Barbara at school and heads for the elevator, and you're wondering why they wouldn't just go together. Barbara asks if Dinah has her new "com set" and Dinah reveals that she's so excited about it that she slept with it on. Helena says she knows, since she could hear Dinah snoring, so she should turn the mike down, while everyone watching says, "Suuure, Helena. Next time Dinah starts snoring, just nudge her, for crying out loud." After Dinah leaves, Barbara says "shoes?" to Helena, since she's obviously forgotten that her alibis have included an emergency with her online baking home business. The exposition starts flying again, and we're informed that Dinah has been obsessing about Hawke since he escaped, and I guess that would explain her COMPLETELY CAREFREE AND CHIPPER DEMEANOUR just now, and Barbara and Helena agree to tell her about Hawke after they catch him. And the camera zooms in on the really low-res shot of Hawke on the computer screen, and I guess he's supposed to appear menacing, but it's actually quite a nice picture of Mitch Pileggi.

Frankie Spitz is mad. He's spitting mad! Heh. He's chewing out some guy on the phone, and we learn that Frankie hired the guys who shot up the restaurant, but he's angry that they missed Hawke since it was like "shooting fish in a barrel," and I'm wondering if maybe the show could explain Frankie surviving that hail of gunfire, like, you'd think he would have excused himself before the shooting started but he was right there. He tells the hitmen they'd better "hide good," since if he finds them he's going to kill them. He hangs up and is suddenly surprised to see some dude in the room, and I swear to god it's Larry Mullen Jr. from U2, who asks, "Are you certain that's what you want?" in a completely dispassionate voice. He steps forward. "Very certain?" Frankie recovers from his surprise to say, "You must be the specialists," and Larry Mullen Jr. nods almost imperceptibly, then asks what Frankie wants done.

Before he tells LMJ, though, Frankie starts praising how direct and to the point Larry seems to be, and unfortunately starts rambling about a friend of his, to the point that Larry has to interrupt to ask again what Frankie wants done. "I want Al Hawke dead," says Frankie. "Are you certain? Very certain?" says Larry, since he is apparently the love child of the Terminator and Regis Philbin, but twice as annoying as Regis. Frankie says he understands that Larry Mullen Jr. can take care of these kinds of problems. "I get the job done. Always," says Larry, making Frankie think the guy's specialty is never missing. "It's not about missing. It's about commitment," says Larry, and it's nice to see a man on television who isn't afraid of commitment. He goes on to explain that indecision is a "weakness" and it's not in his nature to quit. And that's only the first time that the word "nature" will be used to hammer home the theme evoked in the title of this episode. And if you haven't figured out yet that at some point Frankie's going to try to call off the hit but Larry won't stop, well, then I hope you're enjoying the first television show you've ever seen in your life. So Frankie wants to know what makes Larry so "special." And in a perfect world, Larry would have beaten up Frankie for using air quotes. Instead, though, he just walks out the door and Frankie just says "come on!" and then decides to have a cigarette, whereupon Larry walks through the wall, startling Frankie. And I don't mean busts the wall down like Kool-Aid Man; he passes right through it. Frankie's impressed: "Hourly rate or flat fee?" You know, I wanted to be a hitman once, but it's really hard to break into the business. Everybody wants experienced hitmen, but how am I supposed to get experience if no one hires me to kill people?

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Birds of Prey




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