Birds of Prey
Birds of Prey

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Daniel: C | 329 USERS: C+
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The Origin of Feces

Dinah sits as her brain is scanned by a device that, as someone from the boards astutely pointed out, seems unnecessary in a hideout only Helena and Barbara are supposed to know about. And only after this machine is scanning her face with a blue laser does Dinah think to ask what it does. Barbara says it scans for biological evidence of the abilities Dinah's talking about -- that Dinah's a metahuman. "Meta-what?" says Dinah, naturally. Barbara blathers on about how most people only use five percent of their neural cells…then she's startled when the machine reveals that Dinah's cerebral cortex activity is more than fifty percent. And yet Dinah doesn't know enough not to wander alone down dark alleys in an unfamiliar city, looking for a total stranger.

Dinah's depressed by the news of her overactive grey matter, saying she's officially a "freak," drawing a sharp rebuke from Helena, who tells her to "watch it with the f-word." Barbara gently explains that there are many people with abilities beyond what is considered normal. "Don't ask me where the powers come from; no one knows. Natural mutations, biological experiments…" "There's been some really weird stuff with meteor showers," says Helena. Oh, good one. "So I'm like you?" says Dinah. "Well, like Helena, technically. I'm not metahuman," says Barbara. Dinah confirms that they both are heroes and do save people, however, then says, "I want to join." Barbara and Helena aren't having it, though, and Barbara says Dinah should go home. Dinah goes all weepy and asks, "Do you honestly think I'd get on a bus and come to a city where I didn't know a soul with no money and no job if I had a place to go back to?" Oh, god. She prattles on about coming to Gotham not knowing what she was looking for but now she knows and blah blah blah. It's all very boring. "Can I talk to you, now?" Helena says to Barbara. They walk and talk. Well, Barbara rolls, but…anyway. "You can't seriously be considering this!" says Helena, even though Barbara hasn't done or said anything to suggest that she is seriously considering this. "A few hundred years ago, a girl like that would have been burned at the stake," says Barbara. Yeah, so let her stay with you, because of the Salem witch trials…what? WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT, BARBARA? Helena argues against letting Dinah stay for a while until Barbara draws parallels between Dinah and Helena seven years ago, at which point Helena gets all "whatever" and hops on the elevator.

Birds of Prey

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