Birds of Prey
Pilot

Episode Report Card
Daniel: C- | Grade It Now!
YOU GRADE IT
The Origin of Feces

Anyway, Barbara and Helena hug. But the happiness is interrupted by Ketterly, who says menacingly, "You don't belong here. You don't have any legs. You're not Batgirl anymore." On "you don't have any legs," Batgirl collapses. Ketterly strides forward as the techno swells, stoops to pick up the knife, and as he's about to bring it down on Barbara, his arm is grabbed by Helena, who is now Older Huntress Helena (which is also, happily, Cleavage Helena). "Neither do you," she says, confusing millions of viewers, who are suddenly thinking, "He doesn't have any legs?" Hey, I've been hammered by Sars for my unclear antecedents before. Huntress may be metahuman, but she sure ain't got metagrammar, that's for sure. Again with the cat's eye and the bobcat snarl. Huntress and Larry Ketterly scuffle. Can we get this guy a proper villain's name, please? The nefarious, um, Larry Ketterly gets the upper hand and tosses Huntress through a plate glass window. Then, satisfied, he turns his attention back to Barbara. A little too soon, it appears, as Huntress crashes through the wall to tackle him. She could have gone back through the already-broken window with no loss to her vision or her forward momentum, but maximum property damage is always preferred in comic books so long as it's confined to abandoned warehouses, empty tenement buildings, and the like.

The infamous Larry Ketterly wrestles Huntress to the ground. "Why even bother, Helena?" he says, trying to press the knife down. "Even if you kill me, you'll still be alone. You'll always be alone." "Maybe, but it's my screwed-up life and I'll decide when it's over." Whuh? Are we supposed to say, "You go, girl?" Huntress manages to turn the knife around and stab The Notorious Larry Ketterly with it.

Barbara stands up and links wrists with Dinah, and Helena strides over and puts her hand on top on a really annoying Three Musketeers scene.

Back in the real world, everybody wakes up. Barbara takes the knife away. "Welcome back," she says. Helena looks over at Ketterly, who's propped against the wall. He looks conscious but not lucid or anything. "What's wrong with him?" she asks. Barbara theorizes that when Helena killed him in the dream, she permanently destroyed the piece of his mind he said was still in there. "Yeah, well, oops!" says Helena, making me laugh for the second time. Dinah snaps her fingers in front of his face a couple of times and says, "So what are we going to do with him?"

What else? Cut to the sign for Arkham Asylum. I think it's a rule that any exterior shots of the asylum need to include thunder and lightning.

Previous 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18Next

Birds of Prey

Comments

SHARE THE SNARK

X

Get the most of your experience.
Share the Snark!

See content relevant to you based on what your friends are reading and watching.

Share your activity with your friends to Facebook's News Feed, Timeline and Ticker.

Stay in Control: Delete any item from your activity that you choose not to share.

The Latest Activity On TwOP