Birds of Prey
Pilot

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The Origin of Feces

A little later, Helena joins Barbara outside in front of the clock face. "Sometimes I close my eyes and I can almost feel it," says Barbara. "What it was like to race across rooftops under the moon." Wet-blanket Helena says, "Cold, wet…and hell on your nails." Yeah, you sure have it rough, Helena. You know what else sucks? NOT BEING ABLE TO USE YOUR LEGS. Barbara just smiles and says, "I guess I never really let go of who I was…before." Helena: "It's a hard thing to lose." Oh, blah blah blah. You know, I don't remember Batman ever whining like this. Helena turns to Barbara and says, "I can't ever be what you were." Barbara: "Good. Just be yourself instead." Oh, barf. "You're way cooler than I ever was anyway," she adds. "I know," says Helena. The camera pulls away to the pop-folk stylings of Michelle Branch horking out some tripe about wanting "to be like you," in case none of us understood the message of the closing scene.

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Birds of Prey

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