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Where Is God?

"You go to the movies. Something you've already seen." Fade in on Ray talking, sitting on what looks like a rooftop. "Popular, but it's been out a while. That way it's busy but not too crowded. Go to that theater up in the Heights, the one where they take your ticket after you buy your popcorn." Oh, that one. "That way no one notices you going in or out. Just show 'em your stub." Isn't that the person who would notice if you're going in or out? "Take a seat in the back, on the aisle. About twenty minutes in, you get up for some popcorn." That way you haven't missed any of the previews yet and you're just going to be gone during the opening credits. God knows it'd be a damn shame if you missed the fiftieth showing of the trailer for A Man Apart. Quick camera cut to other side of Ray's face to create "dramatic tension" and "style." "But you keep on goin'. All the way to your car. Sit in your car. Three drops of Super Glue on each finger. Wait for it to dry." File your nails. Apply cuticle oil. Always file in one angle; not back and forth." Camera cut, another close-up on Ray's face. "You go to that address. Park around back near the dumpster. Climb the stairs. Knock on the door." Shuffle your feet. Put your hands in your pockets. Think about TiVo. "Tell 'em you're checking a gas leak. When he opens the door, pop him one in the chest. He goes down. One in the eye. One under the chin. Drop the piece and leave." Camera angle changes, this time to include some of the Los Angeles sky. "You go back to that theater. Get your popcorn. Show 'em your stub." Try to hide the blood on your hands. Try not to be all shaky. Hope that the theater is close to the house where you just committed homicide so that the movie is still on. "Sit down." Camera change. "Only obvious question is the gun. Has to be unused. Untraceable." Whoa! Way too close! "You got one?" Camera change as Ray hands over a large envelope and says, "This'll do." He crosses his arms over the back of his chair as the other man leans forward to take the envelope. Pan up to see that it's Fearless. I don't know about you, but I'm feeling...nothing.

Fearless. Just the one title card in this episode. Hope you enjoy. This opening shot is so obvious, I can see the script: "INT. FEARLESS'S MOTEL ROOM: NIGHT. PAN ACROSS FEARLESS'S TINY HOME. CLOTHES ARE STREWN CARELESSLY ALONG THE FURNITURE -- A HAT, A BRA, RED PANTIES. MAGAZINES, PILES OF CDS, AND A PURSE ARE ALL TOSSED ASIDE. WE HEAR AL GREEN CROONING A LOVE JAM, WHILE THE SOUNDS OF KISSING AND A WOMAN'S LAUGH, PEPPER THE ROOM. PAN ACROSS THE BED -- THE SHEETS ARE DISHEVELED. SUDDENLY THE BLANKET IS PULLED FROM THE BED AND ONTO THE FLOOR. THIS IS WHERE FEARLESS AND KATRINA ARE, HAVING JUST FINISHED MAKING LOVE. And for some reason, Fearless is fully clothed. Katrina is just the opposite. She spends the next few minutes flailing around the bed, showing us the curve of her ass, the insides of her thighs -- just enough to allow Boomtown to call itself "gritty." When Katrina flops on the bed, however, I can see she's wearing a flesh-colored thong. "Why do you live in a motel?" Katrina asks Fearless. "I knew that was coming," Fearless says. Me too. Haven't we had this opening scene about three other times in the history of this show's sixteen episodes? Fearless says he likes living in a motel because he can pack up and leave at any time. Nothing holds him back. Katrina asks what he does with the money he makes. "I spend it," he says. He says he has the world's largest collection of Flintstones memorabilia. "Flintstones," Katrina coos with her Russian accent. This scene is .04 seconds away from being a remake of a Bruce Willis scene in Pulp Fiction, complete with blueberry pancakes. Katrina says she's sure Fearless gives the money away. "That's me. Saint Bobby. Well, not technically a saint yet. See, I'm thinking that maybe if I can get you to stop asking so many questions that just may qualify." What? Huh? Katrina says she wants blueberry pancakes. Oh, sorry. She says she wants ice cream. What flavor? "Surprise me." But: "Nothing with nuts." This cracks ol' Fearless up, since Katrina was licking all kinds of things with nuts about three minutes ago. He leaves.

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