Boot Camp

Episode Report Card
Kim: A | 600 USERS: C+
YOU GRADE IT
Meet The Recruits

Okay, how funny is it that the first commercial in the first break of this show is for Campbell's Soup and it starts out, "Mmm mmm, good!" That's hilarious.

Day One. 2:00 PM. It's time for deployment, whatever that means. DI McSweeney voice-overs that in the first part of the process, the DIs try to break people down. The recruits get out of the truck and start walking through a forest in the rain. Recruit Haar, the pig farmer, seems to be having trouble -- she's breathing heavily. DI Francisco talks to her, and dictates a letter home for her, "Dear Mom: Today I went to boot camp. Everybody else went for a walk. I didn't make it." In an interview, DI Francisco says that he's not a big yeller, and he prefers to get his point across in a stern manner. He can yell, but he'd rather not, because his fellow DIs are very good at it. Cut to DI Rosenbum screaming at the recruits to get up a hill. In an interview, DI Rosenbum says that his definition of drill instructor is "you take a mother, you take a father, you take a teacher, you take a disciplinarian, you take a psychologist to a certain degree, you take a physical fitness trainer, and you mix it all together."

DI Francisco voice-overs that this is the new home of the recruits, and it's surrounded by 72,000 acres. They'll sleep in barracks and eat in the mess hall, but "most of [them] will probably end up at the medic." He interrupts to ask Haar if she's going to end up at the medic, and she says, "I hope not, sir!" Francisco shows them onto "their" beach, and points out a lake nearby that has alligators in it. In case you thought he was lying, they show an alligator slipping into the water. The recruits march through ankle-deep water and then do some push-ups. Francisco tells a recruit that if she tries to "cheese some push-ups," he'll make her do eight hundred times more than she's supposed to. Francisco makes Recruit Yaney sit down and get up about ten times in a row, with increasing speed.

3:30 PM. Time to set up their barracks. Recruit Wolf shows all of the other male recruits how to fold their shirts. I don't know why he's the expert, but he is. In an interview, Recruit Wolf says that he's not here for boot camp -- it's "all just a means to get to the money." In an interview, Recruit Thomson says, "I'm Dave Thomson, winner. Whatever I do, I'm going to win." He's so very Stuart Smalley. He claims that the money is "like frosting on the cake," but he's just there to win. Whatever, dude. In an interview, Recruit Whitlow (the soup girl) says that she doesn't want to win everything, because that will make her a target. She's going to do "the little things that [she] can to be a part of the team, and when the times comes, you'll see [her]."

Boot Camp

Comments

SHARE THE SNARK

X

Get the most of your experience.
Share the Snark!

See content relevant to you based on what your friends are reading and watching.

Share your activity with your friends to Facebook's News Feed, Timeline and Ticker.

Stay in Control: Delete any item from your activity that you choose not to share.

The Latest Activity On TwOP