Marilyn, Lauren, and (gasp) Harry, chatting in Marilyn's room. This is the first time Lauren and Harry have been onscreen together. They do not talk to each other, though. They ask Marilyn why they haven't been invited to this secret teacher meeting. "My guess is it's anti-administration, and you two are seen as Steven Harper sympathizers." Yeah, 'cause they're in the cushy opening credits, unlike all those other teachers who toil away in classes and never even appear on screen. Just then, Denise pokes her head into the room and asks to talk to Lauren out in the hall. She says Princeton's not in her future anymore. Turns out, she's three months pregnant. "I'm not a devout Catholic," she says (yeah, apparently not), "but I'm Catholic enough. So, I'm gonna have it. Which means college is kinda out." Wow. Teenage sex of the season, folks. Ladies and gentlemen, it's Yo-lita. She's, like, all pregnant and stuff. Lauren insists that Yo-lita can still go to college, but Yo-lita thinks not, and is trying to look at the pregnancy as a blessing. Lauren is sad. 'Cause she's thinking, "What if I never get knocked up?"
Bow wow wow yippee yo yippee Winslow High. Boyeeee!
The hallway. Lipschultz. What now? Steven grabs him as he goes by. "Where you headed, Harvey? It wouldn't be to a secret faculty meeting?" Harvey: "Well, I'd tell you, Steven. But then it wouldn't be a secret anymore. Would it?" He's got you there, Steve-o. Just then, The Nothing Fairy runs up. "Steven, the meeting was called by Marsha Fennel." Hey, she's The Exposition Fairy again. "You didn't hear it from me." Oh, in that case, she's still The Nothing Fairy. "What's it about?" Another chance! "I don't know yet." Nope. Still The Nothing Fairy. Yo-lita flags down Steven at this point: "My name's Denise DeMarcos. You probably don't know me, 'cause I don't tag bathroom walls and stuff." Heh. Anyway, she needs to talk to Steven in private. As they head into his office, he stops to reprimand Tronnie Kook for teaching reincarnation. Only he doesn't so much reprimand her for it as much as he just observes that she's doing it. She's all, "It's a can opener. I'm just trying to get inside them." It's clearly working. Steven asks Tronnie if she got invited to the secret meeting, and she's like, "What meeting?" and he's like, "Nothing. Never mind." He wanders off to talk to Yo-lita.
Meanwhile, in the secret teacher's meeting, The Daily Show's own Beth Littleford is giving a speech about disrespect for the teaching profession. It's really hard to take her seriously, because her "acting" is exactly the same as her faux-serious journalistic schtick which we all know and love. It's like those Fed Ex commercials with Steve Carrel, where he's still funny, but the things he's saying aren't that funny, so we think the joke must be that the commercial is bad, but since he's trapped inside of it, he can't really make fun of it. You know what I mean? Anyhow, Beth is complaining that the hiring of Ronnie Cook shows disrespect for teachers because it perpetuates the myth that just anybody, trained or not, can wander in off the street and teach. This is a good point, but we're not supposed to like her, so: Boooo! Shut up, Beth Littleford! Why did you move to L.A.? To do this stupid show? I hope not. I hope it was for a guy. Anyhow, various teachers we don't know are nodding in agreement with Beth, but as I said, we don't know them. The actual characters on the show, like Dick Teachie and Marilyn and Dr. Benjamin, are all skeptical.