Breaking Bad
One Minute

Episode Report Card
Joe R: N/A | 21 USERS: A+
One Minute

Walt turns to Saul and asks what happens now, but it's Jesse who answers. "Your scumbag brother-in-law? Is finished. Done. You understand. I will own him when this is over. Every cent he earns, every cent his wife earns, is mine. Any place he goes, anywhere he turns, I'm going to be there, grabbing my share. He'll be scrubbing toilets in Tijuana for pennies. And I'll be standing over him to get my cut. He'll see me when he wakes up in the morning and when he crawls to sleep in whatever rathole's left for him, after I shred his house down. I will haunt his crusty ass forever. Until the day he sticks a gun up his mouth and pulls the trigger, just to get me out of his head. That's what happens next." Here's why Aaron Paul is the effing best. Reading that monologue, it's pure Jesse Pinkman puffery. Think about it -- does Jesse have the means to ruin Hank's life in the way he's describing? Not really. This is Jesse once again playing the badass. But Paul's delivery here is so non-Jesse, it's scary. Even if Jesse can't pull this off practically, Paul makes you believe his fury is such that he'd make it happen. He'll find a way to ruin Hank forever.

Walt's fairly speechless, but Saul's made of sterner stuff. He half-chuckles and advises Jesse against following that particular path. The cops are scared of Jesse now, but if he hits them, they'll have to hit back, hard. Walt softly advises Jesse to move on with his life, move on from "all of it." Jesse, seeing that bit of advice for the self-serving nudge it was, hisses that nothing changes. He's gonna buy a new RV and start cooking again. Walt and Saul think that's patently crackheaded. The cops know exactly who and where he is now. There is a 0% chance he can start cooking and not get caught. "So what?" Jesse asks. "I've got a Get Out of Jail Free card." Saul starts to explain that that's not quite what he meant when he said that, but Jesse cuts him off. Not the photo of his face. He means Walt. He gets pinched, all he has to do is give the cops the mighty Heisenberg. "You're my free pass," Jesse says. "Bitch." Walt's on his heels after that one. He and Saul eye each other warily.

Next thing, Walt and Saul are out in that darkened hallway, conspiring. Walt's dubious that Jesse would follow through on the threat. After all, he didn't give up Walt while he was being beaten senseless. Yeah, but emphasis on the "senseless" there, Walt. Saul's take is a bit more reasoned. "When, not if, he's caught, and he's facing 20 years, what'll he do then? Believe me, there's no honor among thieves. ...Except for us, of course." Saul, you human scum, you. Walt sticks by his feeling that Jesse will come around. If he doesn't, Saul says, they're going to need to "talk options." Oh, man. "Options" is no good. "Options" is "in the head or in the heart?" "Options" is "car wreck or open elevator shaft?" "Options" is "dumped or dismembered?" Saul stalks off before he has to elaborate.

Back from the break, Hank is giving his account of yesterday's events to a pair of I.A. guys, along with Merkert, and a guy who appears to be Hank's attorney or union rep. He pretty much gives a recap of the last episode, up to the point where he left the junkyard and finding out the RV had been disposed of. I.A. asks if it was at this point that he drove to Jesse's home, but Hank's rep keeps him from answering. He says Hank's done answering questions and needs to get home. I.A. confirms that Hank is indeed taking the fifth. Then they advise him that Jesse indeed intends to press criminal charges. And while the word of a meth-head doesn't seem like much, they say the toxicology reports on Jesse say he's not using. He's even refusing pain meds at the hospital. Merkert moves to dismiss the meeting, though I.A. does need one photo of Hank's hands, for the record. Looking at his rapidly scabbing knuckles again doesn't seem to be Hank's favorite thing right now.

Hank doesn't turn the lights on in his office as he clears some stuff out of his desk. Say what you will about what he did to Jesse, but he clearly feels ashamed for it. He walks to the elevator, past his silent co-workers. Waiting for the elevator doors to open, Hank's anxious (to get out of the building), but nowhere near as anxious as the audience at home. We know about the Cousins. He doesn't. Every closed door brings fresh dread. But it's good news: inside the elevator is Marie. Neither one of them says a word, or barely looks at each other, until the door closes. At which point Hank breaks down, sobbing in her arms. His crying is making her cry. And yet, when the elevator hits the ground floor, they're facing forward and silent once again. Ain't nobody getting the satisfaction, from either one of them. "It's all going to work out," Marie assures him as they walk through the lobby. "You've been too good to them for too many years." Hank says it "goes without saying" that they're not telling anyone about this. Marie waits a beat, then, "...okay." Hank knows what that means. He stops, turns to her, and asks: "Who?"

Skyler! It's an associational edit to Skyler! That was kind of a no-brainer, though, right? She's in her car, steeling herself to go up to Walt's new apartment. He's home, fixing himself his favorite PB&J with the crusts cut off. He invites her in, and she's clearly offended by how well turned-out his place is. She asks if Walt knows about what happened with Hank; he does. She asks if whatever Jesse was up to, with this RV, has anything to do with Walt. "Is there any danger that could lead back to you?" is actually the phrasing she uses. You wonder if she's conscious of the fact that she's started to co-opt Walt's life -- and particularly the coverup of such -- as her own. Walt completely bullshits her, saying he had practically no relationship to Jesse anymore. "He's not my friend," he stresses. "It's not like we're even close." Is he? And are you? Those questions and more I think will be answered this season on Breaking Bad! Anyway, Skyler says Hank could really be ruined by this whole thing, and it would be great if Walt could get Jesse to drop the charges. There must be something he can say. "Hank is your family," she pleads. Walt mumbles something so low Skyler can't even hear it. He repeats: "Not currently." Yeah, you can see how Walt would be almost too ashamed to let anyone hear him say that. That's cold. Walt's late for work and shows Skyler out. But the guilt is eating at him, just a little. If Walt were a PB&J sandwich, the guilt would be busy nibbling off his crusts.

At work, Gale cheerfully joshes that he was worried Walt got waylaid. He's still every bit his cheerful, dorky self from last week, but Walt is visibly colder and grouchier than last Gale saw him. Last week, Gale got Happy New Circumstances Walt. Today, he's got Grumpy, Bitchy, Actual Walt. As the guys get suited up, Gale is pleased as punch to inform Walt that he's got them all set up and even filtered the solvent ahead of time. Walt's mouth says "that's good," but his burning, hateful eyes say "You think you're better than me?" Gale delivers his best Bogey ("This might be the beginning of a beautiful friendship."), and while it's not good, that's not the reason Walt is rolling his eyes at his geeky new assistant.

In a deserted parking lot, the Cousins roll their car up to the back of an 18-wheeler. A positively grody-looking trucker meets them at the back, and ... well, it's Nate Mooney, aka Ryan McPoyle from It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia! If there ever was a perfect fit for Breaking Bad's universe of meth-heads and other assorted creeps, it's that guy. So McPoyle invites his taciturn customers inside the trailer, which is only about a quarter full at best. Of course, it's a quarter full with crate after crate of automatic weapons. Teabagger-level shit, I'm saying. McPoyle, by the way, cannot shut up, motormouthing about Memphis and girls who like to get peed on (I don't know...), while the Cousins just stare at him. You know they want to shoot him. Bad. McPoyle also shows them a case of hollow-point bull

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Breaking Bad




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