Anyway, the poem is cheesy and trite and rhymes and shit. Naturally, while Chet's reading (and holding a child â WTF?) Kristina reaches in to adjust her dress over her boobs, which is totally unnecessary and rude and attention-whorey. Mindy commentates as "Kristina lights a candle for her recently deceased father." Hmm. I wonder how long ago he died, because the proximity to this event could indeed explain a lot of the "lashing out" kind of behavior we've been seeing from these girls. I'm curious. But, Bridezillas being Bridezillas, we don't have any relevant background on this family, at all. Hate. Anyway, Kristina's been blubbering this whole time, yet I still haven't seen a single real tear.
Vows, rings (although not the right ones), kisses. Finally. Let's. Get. Drunk. Now!
So, after Mr. and Mrs. Bourgoin are introduced at the reception, I can't help but notice that M'Zill is still wearing her fugtastic gown. What, no "hot" and "sexy" dress? "I was unable to wear my hot and sexy dress because there was so much drama going on. So it looks like Kristina gets all the limelight once again." Oh, Lord have mercy. Kris: "I heard my mom was going to wear some sleazy dress. I'm glad she forgot it." You and me both, sister. You and me both. M'Zill: "Kristina took all my thunder because she cried all the way down the aisle. That was supposed to be my big scene! I wanted everyone to feel sorry for me!" God, get me the fuck out of here!
Next week, Calisse continues to freak out, and we'll meet Malia, who apparently was partially shot and edited with a new production staff on the show, so we'll see if the currently abysmal editing style of the show improves at all.