Rich's best man, Kevin, is on the scene as well, and once they're done with the "celebrity" photographer, Malia takes a "movie star" moment to break Kevin's "celebrity" balls. First, she gets on his case about covering his tattoos, none of which would be visible if he's wearing a tuxedo anyway. Malia then threatens to "castrate" Kevin if he fails in any of the myriad duties he has accepted as best man.
She's also clearly concerned about the bachelor party. In fact, she reveals that she doesn't want Rich to even have one. She keeps trying to convince Kevin that instead of strippers, they should get Rich tattooed. Which, okay, I love tattoos as much as the next guy, but...come on. Strippers! They're so fun! And athletic. Um...er...so I hear! Heh heh... Kevin: "I think we need to do that. Yeah, we need to see strippers, absolutely." Yeah, wrong answer, Broseph. "We gotta get that out of his system and you two will live happily ever after." Malia interviews: "I'm gonna have to stir shit up, because I really don't want Rich to have a bachelor party, but I'm telling all his friends he can do whatever he wants to do. I'm sort of using reverse psychology." No, you're really not.
She takes Kevin aside and "lays down her law." "I don't want there to be any fucking strippers. I don't want you to be fucking late. This is my day. No fucking around." Kevin seems to understand...what an asshole this chick is. This whole scene looked completely staged to me, like she wanted to give the crew what they wanted. Lame. What a narbo. Oh, yes. I went there.
Over with Rhyan and Onur...who, honestly, can we just wrap this shit up already? They are really boring. I mean Sofa King boring. Whatever. They're at the restaurant for their "reception," and Rhyan really wants to see the cake. The staff at the restaurant keep trying to prevent her from going back to see it, which makes it so obvious that it's fucked up somehow. Which it totally is. One side of it is all bashed in, and Rhyan gets upset, and rightfully so, I say. I mean, you pay for a specialty item like a wedding cake, you expect it to not be bashed to shit, you feel me? "Our Bridezilla is ready to launch a full-scale assault!" Really, Mindy? Because it looks to me like she's just calling the bakery to see if someone can come and fix it. She actually seems pretty calm, considering. I mean, she's talking a lot of shit, but she doesn't seem like she's about to go off the deep end. "Hell yeah, I'm pissed off." I'd be livid, truth be told. The cake people come down and avert the crisis by doing emergency surgery on the thing, and that's another three minutes down the drain.