At the play, Cooper as Romeo is getting ready to plant one on Juliet. Which is one of the many reasons that this play is not at all appropriate for fifth graders. Juliet puckers up, Cooper pauses and shoots a silent plea to Luc who gives him encouraging looks and hand gestures. Then Cooper grabs the girl and lays one on her while the adults all hoot and holler. The girl is embarrassed and runs backstage while the set collapses around them and sparks shoot up in the air from falling spotlights. Um, maybe someone should have spent less time hand embroidering the costumes and more time getting that stage up to safety standards. Will no one think of the children?! Sarah will undoubtedly blame Luc for this.

Sarah finds herself out in the hallway getting schooled by The Hyphenate and her cohort. Sarah is promising to pay for any damages done as a result of Cooper's kissing prowess, but the ladies are not satisfied, despite the fact that there is no feasible way for Cooper's kiss to have caused the stage set to collapse. In fact, most parents in Sarah's situation would be considering suing the school for almost dropping a light on her kid's head. But the Bitch Wives want restitution for Cooper's over zealous kiss. They can't help thinking about that poor little girl and her trauma. Sarah explains that Cooper has already apologized and the girl was backstage eating pizza. Sarah apologizes some more even though as far as I can tell neither of the women is the girl's mother. Sarah promises to talk to Cooper about his behavior, but the women STILL aren't satisfied. They think Cooper's behavior is the result of growing up in an overly-sexualized home and Sarah should probably kick Luc out for trying to co-parent while French. That is just too far for even Stepford Sarah. She shakes her head, rids herself of all the nonsense she has been spouting all episode, and calls out one of the condescending ladies for marrying a bazillionaire with a bazillion tax evasion and fraud charges pending against him and calls out The Hyphenate for romping with the pool boy and the gardener. She's about to really get going when Luc pulls her aside, kisses her, and they walk out to co-parent in peace. This was SUCH a stupid storyline. Also, it is really confusing me as to why these two women are at the elementary school production if they are on the board at a snooty prep school? Is Cooper in a play at the prep school? I has confuse.