The best thing about being married to a chef has got to be the breakfasts. Scotty asks Kevin for his steak and eggs order and Kevin blurts, "Bloody." Scotty notices Kevin's foul mood and tries to convince him to act reasonably or at least to chew his words twenty times before he speaks. Kevin isn't interested in playing nice, The Senator's old campaign worker is working for the governor's camp now and Kevin has an earful for "the bitch". When Scotty calls him on his approach, Kevin points out that the traitor wears argyle socks and loafers, what else would you call him? Scotty ponders for a sec, "European?" which is funny. I wish I could write their dialogue. Kevin is prepared for the negotiation to go well, in fact he already has a celebration plan: dinner with friends out on the patio of a local restaurant. Scotty reminds him that they last time they hung out with them he compared it to chewing chili peppers with a mouthful of canker sores. I so wish I could marry Kevin right now! Kevin blinks at the harshness of his own words and then Scotty is on to him: they have a baby. Scotty calls him out on his attempted baby pushing and Kevin backs down. Who wants Kevin to pressure Scotty into having the cutest baby every? I do!
Justin sits in the breakfast nook mumbling like a man on the bus going on and on about the bones of the wrist. He sounds like a schizophrenic off his meds, yet when Rebecca reads a fascinating headline about a feral child in Michigan (new motto: Home to the Saddest Sports Fans in the World) Justin glares at her like she is performing the entire dance routine from "Single Ladies" on top of his text book. She apologizes and moves on to cleaning the breakfast dishes. Justin asks her to please stop cleaning, which she does, then her phone rings and Justin begs her to go do anything else. Because studying must be done in the breakfast nook or he will not graduate and it will be her fault. Rebecca does her trademark whiny apology thing where she starts by saying sorry and then ends with an "I hate you". She then mumbles a rather clunky line about wishing she felt more inspired and you have to wonder whether the same writer pens her lines as Kevin's because they are seriously a lot worse. Justin gives her his new let-me-study-or-the-wedding-is-off look that he must have been practicing in the mirror when he was trying to remember the bones in the hoary eye because he has it down pat. Rebecca scoots before she has to return her engagement Honda.
As The Senator and Kevin walk into the meeting with the governor and are surprised to see Jimmy Carter there to negotiate the peace accord. Oh wait, that's Travis, the traitor. You would think campaigns would make their high-level employees sign non-competition clauses specifically so that they could not make use of insider knowledge and sell it to the highest bidder. Anyway, the governor pretends she is oh-so concerned about her dear friend's health, and The Senator plays along reassuring her that he is fit as a fiddle (which I think is pretty fit, but where do these expressions come from? Do you ever see a fiddle on a treadmill? If you do, will you send me a picture?) Gov. Kern smiles tersely and reminds him that he wasn't on the day in question. Kevin demands verification of their claims and Travis produces a copy of the doctor's report. Kevin points out that having that violates about twelve privacy laws and Travis shrugs. Gov. Kern sweetly expresses concern for The Senator's inability to tell the truth to the public. The Senator smilingly asks if she ever got treated for that STD she picked up from her Mexican paramour. She kindly points out that her affair was "merely anecdotal". Is "merely anecdotal" more like a Dirty Sanchez or a Dutch Oven? Kevin assures her that they have pictures, but he won't share if she won't, so my question remains unanswered. Travis the Traitor seems to think that a hushed-up heart attack is way worse than an affair in the eyes of the electorate. Er...wait. In the age of Gov. Sanford and Gov. Spitzer, not to mention Rep. Ensign, perhaps affairs are the new rite of passage into political lore. The Senator requests that since they are both equipped for mutually-assured destruction, they should perhaps learn the lessons from the Cold War and keep their tense peace. The governor agrees to keep her doctor's report in her pants, so long as The Senator keeps his dirty pictures in his. My, politics truly is a noble profession.