Justin and Rebecca’s relationship hits yet another road bump when he can’t quite manage to keep his sponsee from kissing him in front of his girlfriend. (Get your soft billowy strawberry scented lips off of me, Dimples McDrug addict!) Justin swears it is all in the name of therapy, but Rebecca is losing her patience. Actually Rebecca is losing her patience with all of the Walkers. As “her” brilliant idea to buy land for Ojai sharecropping is finalized, she starts to put the pieces together of Tommy’s underhanded scheme. Of course she doesn’t exactly have proof, but that doesn’t stop her from taking it all to Justin, who obviously isn’t really keen on her aspersion casting. Is this the end of JuBecca? What, weren’t we calling them that? No? Too bad. But it doesn’t matter anyway, because if Rebecca is out as an ersatz Walker, there is another one waiting in the wings. Young Ryan has entered the fray with a series of crank calls to Nora. Perfect way to endear yourself to your new mommy!
Nora hosts a baby shower for Kitty and keeping in line with the Walker tradition, Kitty and Nora end up yelling at each in front of everyone and then making a public apology. Ah, tradition. Despite the over-the-top baby shower, Kitty is sort of in denial about the impending babydom. In fact she is so busy dressing to impress at a job interview that when asked if she has any upcoming commitments that could interfere with her job, she says no. I guess someone is hiring a nanny. After a heart-to-heart with Sarah about motherhood and work, Kitty turns down the job. The Senator is finally ready to man up and admit that he is running for governor, but Kitty has a clairvoyant moment and guesses it. She is not amused. Can’t wait for her to start lecturing him about how he is not taking fatherhood seriously enough and is too focused on his career. That should be hilarious and by that I mean annoying and hypocritical.
Saul refuses to go to the baby shower because he is offended that it was by e-vite and not by embossed invitations. But when Kevin and Scotty point out how incredibly gay that sounds and that as card carrying gay men they are supposed to love theme parties it becomes obvious that the real reason Saul does not want to go is because he doesn't want the family to meet his boyfriend. For good reason. Saul finally succumbs to guilt and goes to the shower with boyfriend in tow. His name is Henry. Henry is nice, we like Henry.
But who are we kidding, the real story this week is Nora’s foray into free love and open relationships. Turns out that Roger the Architect is a freewheeling free love monkey who is in an open marriage with a get out of jail free card for hot little numbers like Nora. Wow Roger, I didn’t recognize you without the Grant Show moustache or the handful of freaky deaky pills. Who knew Pasadena was so close to Swingtown? Obviously Nora can’t handle the truth and opts to just be friends. Cue the sad violin music.
EWWWWWWW. What's that? That's me being grossed out at Rebecca's naked back as she makes out with Justin in bed. What is this Private Practice? If I want soft core porn I'll go online like everyone else, thank you. Justin's cell phone vibrates, but the lovebirds don't notice. Probably because Rebecca's tongue is wedged in Justin's ear and he can't hear. His landline rings (he has a landline? how charmingly retro) and he rolls Rebecca off of him as the dulcet tones of Dimples McDrug-Addict's voice rings through the answering machine. Ever notice how all television characters have answering machines? I know writers use them to forward plots, but seriously, other than your parents do you know anyone who has an answering machine? Voicemail really won that battle and for good reason, too. Anyway Justin's sponsee (as they insist on calling her) is in desperate need of Justin's sage advice on how not to take pills. He promises to be right there as soon as he catches his breath from... running.
Rebecca is operating in lightspeed mode and is already out of bed and dressed. Justin hangs up the phone and notices that he's not getting any action. He can't believe it. Can't a guy answer a phone call in the middle of a little love making? Geez, touchy. Rebecca has to go to work (without showering apparently) and doesn't have time for him right now. Besides, shouldn't he have pawned his little sponsee off on someone else by now? Justin sits up in bed and points at Rebecca, "J'accuse!" He giggles that she's jealous and then I giggle, 'cause, um, Justin? Duh. Big duh. All those drugs probably did a little number on his cerebral processing, so I'll cut him a little slack, but duh. Rebecca rolls her eyes, but Justin has her number now. Rebecca giggles that she's not jealous and girl hits him. She has to go to work because today's the day they sign the orchard deal. She wants to celebrate because it was her idea. Justin tries to lure her back into bed, but she leaves him blue balled and waiting for Dimples to come pick him up. Um... good plan, there, Becky.
Paige is making a bee-yoo-ti-ful family-themed video on a notMac (you know the kind where it is really obviously a Mac but they cover up the logo with a sticker) for Kitty's baby shower. Oh it's that episode is it? Let me guess: Nora goes over the top, everyone drinks too much, Kitty has a hissyfit, Nora yells, and then everyone makes up in time for cake. Nora praises Paige's computer skills and then makes a turn around the living room making sure everything is in order for the shower. Sarah reminds her that Kitty doesn't want anything more than a small family shower (which is good because no one but the Walkers can stand the Walkers, meaning, they have no friends), but Nora insists that games will be fun! Paige interrupts because Julia just IM'd her asking why they aren't inviting Tommy to the shower. Nora reminds Paige about the bee-yoo-ti-ful sign she made for the front door: No Boys Allowed. Showers are for girls only. Paige points out that Kevin, Scotty, and Saul are coming and Nora stares at her with raised eyebrows until she gets the point. So, hold up. Kitty is having a small family shower where they are inviting everyone but Tommy and Justin? And Nora is insisting on playing games? Tommy and Justin should be jumping for joy and Sarah should be considering a sex change. It suddenly becomes apparent that Nora is rushing Sarah and Paige out of the house. Roger is coming over for a "meeting". Sarah raises an eyebrow and Nora sends Paige upstairs. She turns to Sarah and overshares about sleeping with Roger. Okay it wasn't exactly an overshare, but any time a mother involves a daughter in her sex life I consider it an overshare. I have shivers just thinking about it. Sarah, on the other hand, squeals in delight over her mother's fornication. She wants details because she is a pervert, but Nora's response is thankfully cut short by a phone call. It's a hang up. One in a series. Sarah teases her some more in a completely inappropriate and over-the-top fashion (seriously, she does a pantomime), calls for Paige, and leaves her mother to it. Nora growls in anticipation.