Nora has called a family powwow, but she is too busy having flashbacks about a young Tommy calling her after a car accident to cook. So everyone thinks Nora is snorting Boniva, because she suggests ordering in. How long have we been gone? Because Kitty's hair has morphed into a power bob since the last episode. Anyway, Nora wants everyone to sell their Ojai shares to Dennis York, further reinforcing the idea that Nora is misusing her lady drugs. As with any and every Walker dinner party, everyone starts yelling and someone storms off.
Justin and Rebecca can't believe that Nora would suggest Justin sell his shares in Ojai when Rebecca just gave her mom TWO MILLION DOLLARS to invest in the company. Scotty wants Dennis York's dirty money NOWish so that he and Kevin can afford to knock up that awful woman and make a baby. Kitty and The Senator and a giant baby Evan aren't interested in talking about Ojai, because Kitty has her first post-cancer check up and a political campaign to run. Meanwhile Sarah had Flashdance hair and MC Hammer pants in her flashback to an argument between Nora, William, and Dennis York, who was apparently William's "problemsolver". Sarah and Tommy try to remember the details of the fight, but come up short. Tommy tries to convince Sarah to sell Ojai and get rid of the past, but he might just be recruiting for his Mexico yoga cult. Nora goes to meet Dennis York and he gives her one week to get her kids to sell. Dennis promises to destroy her family if she doesn't get them to sell and hands her a stack of evidence to prove his point.
Obviously Holly is not thrilled that after she turned down Dennis York (both financially and biblically), she may end up being partners with him in the boardroom, if not the bedroom. Holly tries to convince Sarah that Ojai is the pinnacle of awesomeness and dangles the promise of buried treasure at Narrow Lake. But when Sarah tries to tell Nora that she's not selling, Nora has a full on screamy meltdown. Tommy watches from the sidelines and remembers something about a car accident he was in. He confronts Nora who breaks down under all the pressure. She admits that William had been paying off a family of someone injured in an accident when the kids were young. After William died, Nora started making the payments. Tommy is shocked. They told him everything was okay.
Sarah, Kevin, and Kitty are discussing the Big Nora Freakout and during the post-mortem they realize that the argument Sarah witnessed happened the night of Sarah's big Ojai party and ALL the kids were there (except Justin who was just a wee thing and couldn't hold his liquor for shit). Sarah got Kitty drunk on wine coolers, Kevin crashed the party and Tommy crashed the car and got the party busted. Kevin remembers then that Tommy was drunk and he wasn't alone in the car -- he was with another kid. Just as they are about to crack the case, Tommy comes and breaks up the party. They all leap to conclusions and Kevin takes a flying tackle of blame at Tommy, calling him out for killing a kid and costing the family their beloved company. Does Tommy defend himself? No. He simply denies it ever happened.
Kitty comes home to complain to The Senator and he's like: Yeah, duh. I had you all vetted and I know ALL this shit. He gives Kitty the dirt. Which is: nothing. Tommy didn't hurt anyone that night. Kevin flashes back to a near-make-out-session-turned-fist-fight he had that night. His dad broke up the fight, but it was too late. Kevin ages about ten years before our eyes as Tommy breaks the news to Kevin that the boy Kevin fought with was paralyzed.
Nora defends her actions to Kevin, but he can't hear it. He thinks she was only protecting herself, which is… odd. So Nora goes to talk to the only person who could fully understand: William Walker. But lest you think she's going soft, after seeking consolation, she reminds him that she hates him. Meanwhile, Sarah is doubting her mother while Kitty is worrying about her cancer visit and Justin and Rebecca GET MARRIED. Because the Walker phone tree has come to a COMPLETE STANDSTILL and Justin has NO IDEA that his family is falling apart. Like, TIMING, people.
Tommy, Saul, and Sarah tell Scotty Kevin's big secret, but Kevin needs a LOT more time to get everything sorted. While Kevin falls to pieces, Holly pitches an idea to Nora: Find Narrow Lake and Save her Family. Nora is totally into that idea. While Nora is escaping her problems, Kevin is facing his: He goes to apologize to Aaron. Who is living just fine in a wheelchair and not hooked up to a ventilator or paralyzed from the eyelid down or anything. Aaron is kind of confused that Kevin is stopping by after all these years, because, well, he's fine. He's moved on. He encourages Kevin to do the same, just not in his living room.
Nora and Holly are up to something. While Nora distracts Dennis at the bar with a trip down awkward memory lane, Holly pillages his room looking for clues. And then they STEAL HIS CAR, get milkshakes and call each other Thelma and Louise and then crash Justin and Rebecca's honeymoon at the old Walker family homestead in Ojai. Wacky hijinks are the best birth control next to finding out that your brother accidentally paralyzed a guy in high school. And then Sarah and Tommy show up in Ojai to try and stop Nora's trip of insanity. Too late! The cops show up and Nora and Holly get hauled off to jail. The Senator springs them in time for the celebratory family wedding dinner. Then Justin hands Nora a clue to Narrow Lake, which Kevin deciphers: Narrow Lake is an anagram for Nora Walker.
Two hours and not a single kid got de-Walkered? What? Oh Brothers & Sisters, I am disappointed.
Lulu Bates a.k.a. Melissa Locker would rather have been watching Treme . You can follow her on Twitter @woolyknickers.
I guess after Who's the Boss got canceled ABC had some 80s style rich people props lying around the lot, because as the two hour Brothers & Sisters movie event starts, we see a gold BMW accordioned into a telephone pole, like Mona had one two many white wine spritzers at the 60-40 bar and trashed Angela's car while she was driving and giving a BJ to an old sailor. Tony is going to be SO mad! Sitting on the curb is a young Tommy Walker talking on a cell phone as big as his head with his arm in a sling. Strangely, there are no cops gathered around him staring at the phone asking him if they can see it when he's done. Tommy apologizes to his mom. Cut to modern day where grown up Tommy is calling Nora who has been staring at some paper plates so long that Tommy is starting to wonder if they have mind melded with her and she is going to start screaming about double plating when eating greasy pizza. Nora snaps to and Tommy gently asks her if she is okay, because if she's not ready, they can just pretend the dinner is a welcome home supper for Tommy. Ooh a Walker family dinner. This should be great! Wait...paper plates? Nora must be really miserable and distracted if she is willing to destroy a forest for her own ease and convenience. Saul comes in and greets Tommy and then Kitty with mysteriously long hair. How much time has passed? She went from Sue Sylvester to a Power Bob in what should have been only a few days. I mean, how long was Nora in Seattle? Maybe it is due to Kitty's freakish metabolism. Continuity people get on this shit! Moving on: Everyone pours into Nora's kitchen and are surprised and a bit confused to see Tommy. Nora claims he is just there for a visit, but nobody believes that. Kitty inappropriately asks if he is engaged, which is seriously an odd thing to ask a guy who moved to Seattle to be near his recently ex-wife and child. Nora quiets everyone down so they can decide what to order and to delay the inevitable. But everyone wants Thai, because is there any other form of take out? No. And I'll fight you, so don't argue. So Nora's delay tactic didn't take and everyone stares at her silently, waiting for her to explain why she called an emergency meeting. I guess she also told them to leave their spouses/partners/boyfriends at home, because nary a Luc, Scotty, Senator, or Rebecca is in sight. As all her children stare at her, Nora gulps, takes a deep breathe, and starts: They all know that a company tried to buy out Holly's shares in Ojai and Holly refused to sell. Now that company has made the Walkers a very generous offer for their shares. Sarah interrupts her right there. And, frankly, she should. Since Sarah is the president of Ojai Foods, I find it more than a little strange that Nora would approach her at the same time as Kevin, who hasn't had an interest in Ojai since his firm got fired, or Kitty, who is running for the senate and not interested in Ojai as anything other than a prop to prove her small business roots. It's a bit tactless. And, obviously, Sarah is going to have a bigger decision to make, what with giving away her job. Nora points out that while the company has been great for them as a family, it has also been an albatross around their necks for years. Nora tries to sell Sarah on being a housewife, which doesn't go over so well (because it is so not Sarah). Like, just point out she can get another job and take her kids on another European vacation or just move to France with Luc instead of sitting in Ojai and getting in fights with Holly. Then Justin asks if this has anything to do with Narrow Lake, which opens another can of worms and Sarah gets even huffier because she is in the dark about another work-related topic. Nora downplays Narrow Lake and keeps trying to sell the plan and finally Kitty barks at her to stop trying to spin it. Saul then asks Nora to tell the kids everything. Nora sighs and then upsells Dennis York as just some guy. Sarah, however, is old enough to remember Dennis York as the sketchy guy William Walker paid under the table to do his dirty work. Tommy and Saul object to that portrayal. York was just a "problem solver", but not a hitman or anything. A consigliore, then? Nora shrieks that there are no bodies buried anywhere, this is just a business offer that she is bringing to their attention. Then she storms off. Kevin thinks they have landed in Bizarro World, but it looks like any other Walker dinner party to me.
Justin goes home and tells Rebecca the weird news that after Holly turned down Dennis York, now Nora wants them all to consider the offer. This especially ticks Rebecca off because just last episode she gave her mom TWO MILLION DOLLARS to try and stabilize the company while they get to the bottom of whatever the hell Narrow Lake has to offer. I mean, TWO MILLION DOLLARS! (For some reason, I keep imagining this is said in the voice of this kid from the incomparable Better off Dead.) Rebecca can't believe Nora doesn't think that Narrow Lake has buried treasure in the bottom of it. I mean, Narrow Lake sounds like a suburban pirate adventure if I ever heard one, right? Rebecca is also convinced that Justin will just end up siding with Nora and Holly will be angry and they will be stuck in the middle. Justin swears that would never happen to them! He chooses her! They will never argue again! Except when Rebecca takes up jazz tap lessons and doesn't tell him! Or he flunks out of medical school for never getting that scrambled brain thing taken care of even though Rebecca told him to! Other than that, never! Love and hearts and unicorns, motherfuckers!
Scotty cannot believe their good fortune. He and Kevin are unemployed and somebody wants to overpay for their Ojai shares. They can buy a baby! He could open a restaurant! Money money money! Kevin rudely interrupts Scotty's happy dance to point out that he hasn't accepted the offer yet and he doesn't want to take it until he knows the truth. He thinks something is suspicious and he thinks Nora is trying to cover it up. He thinks it may all be Tommy's fault. He's not sure how, yet, but he is pretty confident. Geez. When did Kevin turn into such a grouch about Tommy? I thought they resolved their differences? Scotty reminds Kevin that not everything is Tommy's fault so maybe they can just take the money and buy another round of IVF if they have to? Kevin scolds him for being negative about the IVF ands sends Scotty back to his room to re-read The Secret.
The Senator finds Kitty playing with Monster Baby Evan in the bedroom. Evan looks HUGE! It's like he and Kitty's hair took some Mommy and Me growth hormones. The Senator asks how it went and Kitty sighs about how deluded she was growing up. She doesn't know what is going on with her mother or with that company. The Senator isn't particularly interested in Ojai Foods right now (probably ever). He wants to know if Kitty told her family about her upcoming post-cancer doctor's appointment. She didn't get a chance to what with all the yelling and bombshells dropping. The Senator reminds her that she is going to be A-Okay after that appointment and Kitty sighs some more about her new life as a cancer survivor. As The Senator cuddles with the adorably pajama-clad Evan, Kitty announces that she is going to sell her shares. It is what her mom wants and if Nora is in some kind of trouble, well, Kitty for one will help her out. The Senator nods and pats her on the head. He really doesn't care.
Sarah sits alone watching television and having flashbacks to the 80s. She remembers a particularly loud argument between Nora, Dennis York, and William Walker. She would have eavesdropped, but a little tiny Justin interrupted her spying and she felt inclined to take him back to bed. Man, if I was Sarah, I would forget I ever wore mustard yellow high waisted balloon jodhpurs with a red belt that matched the barrette holding my perm back. I would forget that PRONTO. Sarah calls Tommy and he comes over to try and help par