Scotty is sound asleep on the couch when Kevin tracks him down for an early morning booty call. In the living room? With a near-tween and a baby within five feet of you? And the TV isn't on Noggin? Oh man, don't let the adoption facilitator find out about this! As Scotty sleepily explains that baby Daniel kept him up and Kevin is groping him, the phone rings. Yes, Kevin was going for it with his Bluetooth headset on, which, gay or straight, has GOT to be a dealbreaker. I mean, ew. There are SOME rules that are universal. Also, if we all work together we can ensure that no one wearing a Bluetooth headset ever has sex again. It worked so well when we all banded against those pleated khaki pants wearers! Just say no, people. It's what Nancy Reagan was talking about.
Scotty wakes up enough to realize what almost happened and hits Kevin on the head saying, "Ew! Ew!" We can't have a series finale without one last Walker phone tree. So Kevin is on the phone (hands free!) and is reassuring Sarah that everything is okay. Then Kitty is on the other line and wants to talk to Kevin, but not about wedding stuff. Just call her whenever he gets a minute. Then Paige calls and begs Kevin to convince Sarah to let her invite her boyfriend to the wedding. Sarah says no and Kevin hangs up on Paige. Then Sarah asks about the hotel and asks whether Justin is still sleeping with the manager. Then Sarah hangs up and calls Luc who is lying in bed claiming he is excited to see his parents when Cooper runs in and starts jumping up and down on him. Wait, wait, Sarah saddled Luc with her children on his last night of bachelorhood? And she doesn't think THAT will jinx the marriage?
So Cooper is reenacting the finer points of Hop on Pop on Luc's well-toned abs and then Paige barrels into the room demanding that Sarah let her boyfriend come to the wedding. Sarah tells Luc to handle it. Welcome to married life, bitch! The Walker phone tree is apparently genetic because Paige is now putting Sarah on hold to call Olivia who wanders into the living room to find Kevin and Scotty engaged in a little over-the-clothes action on the couch. SCOTTY: HE STILL HAS HIS BLUETOOTH ON!! Olivia ignores her dads rounding third and asks if they are guilt addled enough to help Paige get her boyfriend on the guest list if she asks nicely and makes puppy dog eyes. They don't fall for it and remind her that it is not their business.