Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Bargaining, Part II

Episode Report Card
Sep: C | 3 USERS: B
Bargaining, Part II

Demons. Bashing. Carousing. The Summers's mailbox takes a hit. Dawn peers out the living room window while Spike mutters about the lack of useful weaponry in the house. Well! I seem to remember that trunk being chock-a-block with weapons during "The Gift." This is what you get when you don't put things back where they belong! Spike notices Dawn hanging out by the window and pulls her away, threatening to "thump" her. Dawn wants to know who the demon bikers are; Spike explains that they're a roving gang that targets "anyplace they think is vulnerable." As he says those words, something seems to occur to him; he grabs Dawn by the hand and leads her to the door. Dawn doesn't want to leave, protesting that they have to "wait for the others. And Buffy [beat] bot." Aw. Poor Dawnie. Having to live with an anthropomorphic sandwich maker-slash-demon fighter that looks like your dead sister must be pretty hard to deal with. Spike gives Dawn a little pep talk, and they take off. I might spend more time on it if I weren't completely disgusted with the Spike-as-sitter storyline. Remember when Spike used to have an all-access pass to evil? Yeah. Me too. Now he's got an all-access pass to the fridge and as much cable TV he can stomach. Yawn.

Buffy's grave. A hand breaks through the soil, and Buffy claws her way free. Eesh. Just take a minute to imagine the logistics of digging your way out of a grave. How do you manage to break through the coffin lid despite the tons of dirt pressing down on it? Where does all the misplaced dirt from your tunnel go? How do you keep the sides of it from collapsing? How do you breathe without clogging your lungs with dirt? How do you STAY SANE while you claw through SIX FEET of cold, hard earth? Okay. I'm done creeping myself out now. I think the reason this disturbs me so much is that it awakens my latent fear of earthquakes. Which isn't a fear of the earthquake itself as much as a fear of getting trapped under rubble from the building that has just collapsed on me and then having to gnaw my own leg off while waiting for people to realize that I'm missing. I was recently discussing this with a friend of mine, who essentially said, "Well, when life gives you lemons…" I was all, "The hell? My last few pain-filled hours on this earth are not going to be spent making the best of a bad situation. 'Well, I may be impaled by rebar through my right kidney, but at least I still have one eye to watch out for rescuers!'" But anyway. You guys are here to read about this here episode of Buffy, not my personal phobias. Speaking of the episode, here we go: Buffy looks around confusedly.


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Buffy the Vampire Slayer




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