Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Beer Bad

Episode Report Card
Sep: D | 3 USERS: D
YOU GRADE IT
Beer Bad

Thanks to Ace, Keight, and owen.

I'd like to preface this by saying that, in my opinion, this was the worst episode of Buffy that I've ever seen. And yes, I have seen Bad Eggs. I really, really did not like this episode. The same day I saw it, I was involved in a car accident, and Buffy was by far the worse experience. I'd also like to know what bad mojo Ace has been flinging my way, because I've gotten all of the crappy episodes so far.

Previously on Buffy: Again with meeting Parker, dancing with Parker, "making a choice" with Parker, confronting Parker, moping over Parker. Quoth Xander, "Say hi to non-college guy." FratJerk says, "Townie, huh?" Who says that? I've never heard anyone called a "townie" in my entire life. Oz stares at a blonde girl. I hate her already.

Matrix-y techno, bad-video-game-type music plays. We see Buffy whipping a vampire's butt in a graveyard at night; the fight continues with dynamic stunts and lots of flipping and rolling. Parker, crouched in the bushes, calls "Buffy?" She turns to look at him and tells him to stay down. She continues to fight the vamp and executes a Matrix-reminiscent move by running up the front of a headstone and launching off it into a flying kick. More vampires attack Buffy as others attempt to abduct Parker. She fights them all and stakes them one by one. As she stops to catch her breath, Parker approaches, chagrined. Romantic music swells. "Buffy, I don't know what to say. After how I've treated you -- now I owe you my life," he says. "It's nothing," replies Buffy demurely. "It's everything," replies Parker, "you're everything and I'm gonna do whatever it takes to get you to forgive me. Do you think one day you might --" And a girl's voice breaks in, giggling. We see that Buffy is actually daydreaming in her Psych lecture. Beside her, Willow is diligently taking notes. Buffy stares at Parker, who is sitting a few rows ahead of her and flirting with the giggling girl. Buffy looks sad. Dr. "Houseman Wannabe" Walsh is lecturing about the id, ego, and superego. She explains that the id has simple needs. She lectures about the id working on the pleasure principle, and we see Parker again, still flirting. "The id doesn't learn. It doesn't grow up," pontificates Dr. Walsh. As she says, "What do we do when we can't have what we want?" Buffy drifts back into her vampire-slaying daydream. She dusts the same four vamps and Parker approaches again. This time he's holding a dozen roses and a container of ice cream and his shirt is unbuttoned. He gives the same speech as before and offers Buffy the ice cream.

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Buffy the Vampire Slayer

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