Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Buffy the Vampire Slayer

Episode Report Card
Ace: B- | 1339 USERS: B-
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Beneath Who?

Anyway, the principal thinks students will want to talk to Buffy and advises her that she shouldn't judge or evaluate them. Her role will be just to listen and provide understanding. Oh, please. Nobody is going to open up to anyone else in a cubicle. Buffy seems to have missed the point entirely though, because she just asks all excitedly, "Can I give detention?" Wow, Little Miss Power Trip. Sure, give them detention. In a listening and understanding way. Sigh. Why would she even be dishing out punishment unless the students directly break rules while in her office? Wood says she can give detention and admonishes her not to make friends with the kids, because if she does so "these students will eat [her] alive." Buffy asks, "You heard about Principal Flutie, right?" "He was the one whose woolly-headed, liberal thinking lead to his being eaten, right?" asks Wood. Actually not. I just missed Snyder for a moment. Wood just looks confused and then makes a lame attempt to relax Buffy by adding, "There's only three things these kids understand: the boot, the bat and the bastinado." He chuckles but spots Buffy's blank look and muses that no one ever gets the joke because they don't know what a bastinado is. "Wooden rod used to slap the soles of the feet in Turkish prisons, but if made with the correct wood, makes an awesome billy club," dictionaries Buffy. The principal thinks she'll "fit in just fine." Buffy's curious as to why she has the job, suggesting that perhaps Wood "enjoyed [her] work at the Doublemeat Palace." Hee. Nope, he's a vegetarian. Guess he doesn't know the secret of the meat there. He doesn't know much, does he? Anyway, he's not a vegetarian with a very good answer to Buffy's question, as he just replies that the students need someone who understands them. That's not any more of an answer than it was the first six times we heard it this episode. Then he wonders if there's something he should know about Buffy; she claims she can't think of anything. After Principal Wood leaves to discipline some students, Buffy decides to snoop around the school some more.

She heads for the basement, looking for Spike. The rats are there, but no Spike. The door slams behind her.

Back at the ranch, or uh, the pastoral estate in Westbury, England, Willow sits on a suitcase in a doorway, looking out. What a beautiful place. Seeing it combined with hearing his heartbreaking song about missing his daughters ("Babies [the in between]") helps me to understand why Tony Head wanted so much to go home. Giles, looking delicious in leather, comes up behind Willow. He leans in and confides, "Taxi's here." I, for one, have never felt more thrilled or excited to hear the word "taxi." Willow doesn't make a move and Giles gently teases her, "And in keeping with quaint old British tradition, you would now be expected to get into it." Willow's not sure she can; she feels she's not done with her work in England. When he says it's her fear talking, she admits it is but asks if she should ignore her instincts. She's afraid of going home and "screwing up again." The taxi beeps. Giles asks Willow to be specific about her fears. I'll tell you mine, Giles! I'm afraid Willow's going home to Sunnydale and we'll never see you again! Just keep her with you for the next episode, or twenty, okay? Oh, I guess we were talking about Willow. Fine. She's worried about not being able to handle the problems that are brewing in the Hellmouth, and that if she does try to handle them she'll end up all "veiny and homicidal again." Giles wonders if she's actually worried that the Scoobies won't take her back. Oh, hell, Willow. After the freakin' red carpet treatment murderers like Spike and Anya get, no worries for you, huh? You killed two people? Small potatoes compared to the Demon Lover contingent. Giles crouches down in front of her but doesn't say any of that. Instead he chooses to tell her that no matter how long she stays in England, she will never become more sure that the "friends [she] left behind [her] are still [her] friends." Yikes. "You may not be wanted," he continues, "but you will be needed." He pats her knees and stands. Swoon, Uh, sorry. Giles tells her to trust herself and then opens an umbrella to walk her out to the taxi. Oh, Willow, don't leave the sheltering protection of Giles!

Buffy the Vampire Slayer

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