Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Blood Ties

Episode Report Card
Ace: B- | 3 USERS: A-
YOU GRADE IT
Thank YOU very much, Second Law of Thermodynamics!

At Der Zauber Kasten, Buffy fills the gang in on Dawn's activities. For some reason, possibly tracking purposes, Buffy is wearing a mangy weasel in place of a coat collar. Willow is aghast that Dawn burned her diaries since she's been keeping them "since she was…" "Seven. I remember too, Will," finishes Buffy. Look. I realize that, out of all the WB shows, Buffy probably has the best grasp on continuity and that I shouldn't complain. I mean, it's not like I have to deal with the actual folding of space and time that happens over on the Creek, but is it too much to ask that the writers stay clear about information that was imparted to us mere episodes ago? Like the news that Dawn moved to Sunnydale when she was nine? I could cut the writers some slack and assume that Willow has been told that Dawn has been keeping diaries since she was seven, but the line was written more like she's been watching the process since Dawn was seven. Anyway, Buffy splits the gang up into search parties, taking Spike on her team. Because Spike just stopped by Der Zauber Kasten to have a deep discussion with Giles about the changes in the Labour Party in Britain over the last century, I guess. Oh. Except that would totally never happen. Can someone tell me why he's here again? Contrivance waggles an eyebrow at me, and I tell him that as long as he's here he should run down to the damned store and pick me up some Vivarin before I fall asleep.

Over at one of Sunnydale's many deserted playgrounds, Dawn walks by the swings and has a touching, utterly contrived memory of a young Buffy pushing her on the swings. I'm not going to blame the writers for the fact that memory-Buffy looks to be no more than thirteen (and sounds ten) and would, of course, not have been living in Sunnydale at that time. The shooting script claims the memory occurs in the playground Dawn is staring at, in which case Buffy should have been sixteen and Dawn about ten. Instead, I will content myself with being deeply disappointed with monks who crafted an entire existence for Dawn replete with actual physical diaries dating back seven years, but somehow forgot to insert realistic pseudo-images of sisterly affection. It's really true; they just don't make things like they used to.

Next there's a stupid scene in which Xander gets off on the fact that a thousands-of-years-old "super power in a raw form" is "digging the Xand-man." Xander manages to totally ignore the fact that he's deriving sexual satisfaction from the admiration of a fourteen-year-old girl. Giles is as disgusted as I am and stalks off. However, he doesn't point out, even though he really, really should, that when you look back on the crushes you had in your early teens, you're usually terribly, terribly embarrassed and that, like Dawn, Xander's haircut is about a thousand years out of place, having last been seen on a chap known as Dorkus Maximus.

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Buffy the Vampire Slayer

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