Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Buffy vs. Dracula

Episode Report Card
Buffy vs. Dracula

Buffy runs and tackles Dracula. They roll around a bit and fight. I must say that the stunt double's pink leather-clad butt is painfully obvious in this fight scene. Buffy grabs a torch and almost sets Bland the Impaler on fire. He starts to dissipate, but Buffy catches on to which way the wind is blowing and, after a running start, takes a flying leap up to the mezzanine level. She stakes Dracula just as he starts to reappear and asks him, "How do you like my darkness now?" as he turns into dust. She descends to the main floor, by way of the stairs this time, as Riley and Giles rush in. In response to their queries, she tells Riley that she's "chock full of free will" and that Dracula is "Euro-trashed." Heh. At that moment Xander runs into the room, torch in hand, wanting to know, "Where's the creep that turned me into a spider-eating man-bitch?" Buffy replies that he's gone, and Xander says that he's "sick of this crap. I'm sick of being the guy who eats insects and gets the funny syphilis. As of this moment. It's over. I'm sick of being everybody's butt-monkey." What is a butt-monkey, anyway? Might I suggest that the first step on the path to un-butt-monkeyness might be to get his own apartment? Riley tries to reassure Xander, telling him that "at least you weren't making time with the Dracubabes like Giles here." Giles and Riley bicker good-naturedly as the gang files out.

All of a sudden, after everyone has left, we see Spacky rematerialize, and from off-screen Buffy stakes him. "You think I don't watch your movies?" she quips. "You always come back." He dissipates again and starts to reform in almost the exact same spot when Buffy breaks in, "I'm standing right here," in a very annoyed voice, and the smoke dissipates again. Okay. Funny. Sure. But what the hell was that? Is Dracula dead? I mean, "undead"? You know what I mean. If dusting him doesn't get rid of him, what does? Having that scene there was just a bad decision on the director's part. I think it would have worked much better over the credits, much like the talent show scene from "The Puppet Show."

Establishing shot of Casa Giles. Buffy walks in to sit down on Giles's couch, because apparently Giles wanted to talk to her. Buffy's outfit is just terrible. All I'm saying is that it looks like burlap is the hot new fabric for fall. Fugly smocked burlap, paired with jeans with a prosthetic pot-belly attachment. This is proof that the wrong cut can make anybody look bad. Anyway, Buffy tells Giles that she has something to tell him too, but he insists that she go first. She starts out with, "You haven't been my Watcher for a while. I haven't been training and I haven't really needed to come to you for help." She quickly segues into how she's changed since the spell they performed in "Primeval," and she needs to know more about her origins as a Slayer. "But I'm scared. I know it's gonna be hard. And I can't do it without you. I need your help. I need you to be my Watcher again." Giles looks almost overcome with emotion, but instead of, y'know, hugging Buffy or saying anything, he just grabs for his teacup.

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Buffy the Vampire Slayer




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