Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Buffy the Vampire Slayer

Episode Report Card
Sep: B | 1268 USERS: B-
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Giles gets snide, saying it's a "comforting, bloodless way of looking at it." Quentin again cuts him off at the knees with a condescending, "Giles, let me talk to Buffy. I think she's understanding me." Ouch. That'll leave a mark. Buffy purses her lips as Quentin explains that Glory is a "more powerful instrument" than Buffy is, and that Buffy will get the information they have on Glory if she passes their review. Seems like an awfully harsh proposal to leave a supposedly incompetent Slayer without helpful information about a force like Glory, but we all know that the CoW is petty like that. Giles gets huffy and yells, "She's not your bloody instrument and you have no right to do any of this!" Yay, Giles! He gets in a little hand-slapping match with the big CoWboy, and Buffy admonishes him, "Giles!" She looks sulky as Travers says he understands that they might not feel the review is fair, but if they don't comply, the CoW will shut down Giles's store and have him deported "within the day. Never to set foot in this country again." Okay, already! As Buffy looks wide-eyed at Giles, Quentin continues, "You're dealing with grown-ups now. Am I making myself clear?" Long, long pause during which I yell at the TV, in my very best Rick from The Young Ones voice, "Oh, verrrry!" Fade to commercial. You all know Rick from The Young Ones, right? Well, you should.

Not-Dreg sidles into Glory's dressing room. Hey, according to the closed captioning, his name is Jinx! Whatever. I hate Jinx. He's like the New Coke of obsequious trolls. Anyhoo, Glory, clad only in a red towel, wants to know what happened to Jinx's face, and we see that he's covered in cuts and bruises. Well, I think they're bruises; it's hard to tell with all the crustiness. As Glory slathers on lotion, Jinx explains that the beating is a "message from Ben. He isn't going to help." Glory repeats this, as though she has genuinely never heard such a phrase in her life. She seems very confused. Glory rants about Ben refusing to help and actually says, "He could seduce [Buffy] and bang the Key out of her!" Pretty crass for eight p.m.! Is Xander going to be described as "throwing a hump into" Anya? Sheesh. Jinx describes Ben as "quite attractive," and Glory snaps, "Well, of course he's attractive!" Hmmmmm. Glory cuddles Jinx up against the wall, and as he waves his hands nervously, she croons, "Sweet bumpy minion. You're the only one that understands." Hee -- for some reason I'm finding Glory somewhat more amusing this scene. She flings her hands up, saying Ben "makes [her] sooo mad," and Jinx cowers, thinking he's going to get his brain sucked. Oh, I just went to a scary mental place. Ew. Glory stomps off, muttering that she'll find Buffy herself, and Jinx breathes a sigh of relief.

Buffy the Vampire Slayer

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