Buffy the Vampire Slayer

Episode Report Card
Sep: B- | 3 USERS: A-
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In one of the "humorous" segues popular this season, we next see Buffy yawning widely in class; she taps, then drops, her pencil. The professor lectures that Rasputin's assassins found it "nearly impossible" to kill him, and Buffy quietly echoes "nearly impossible," which prompts her professor to rip into her. Clearly Dr. Crankypants drinks too much caffeine and needs to start filling it to the rim with Brim. Which I don't think is even made anymore, so scratch that old joke. Then there's an exchange between Buffy and the prof wherein Buffy demonstrates that she has done the reading by knowing a lot about Rasputin, but implies that perhaps he didn't die by drowning after all. That's better than I can do right now. All I can remember is the Too Much Joy song about reincarnation that contains the line, "I was Rasputin. I was all the chicks he had." The professor chides her that the "academic community" accepts Rasputin's death as a fact, Buffy makes a snotty remark about Columbus not discovering North America, and the professor gets pissy that Buffy finds "the facts" boring. Apparently, he's had problems with her in the past, namely that she has an unconventional approach to the "mysterious sleeping patterns of the Prussian generals." He mocks her quite cuttingly. This is a well-written scene, in that it implies but never blatantly states that Buffy's life with the supernatural is leading her to view the subjects taught in college in a unique light, but I think the stereotypical Paper Chase-type professor is overdrawn. At a state school, you'd probably get your ass sued by a bunch of angry moms for inflicting "mental anguish" on their poor little dears. Ask Ace -- she'll tell you some stories about state schools.

Later, Buffy is venting her anger at her instructor as she fights a vampire. She throws him to the ground and sneers a line the professor said to her, "Maybe you'd like to teach your own class!" which causes the vamp to look around and dimly inquire, "Who're you talking to?" They fight, and suddenly Spike comes flying over a backhoe and dusts the vamp. He grins, looking quite proud of himself. Buffy storms up and demands to know why he interfered. Spike assures her it wasn't for money, but for her "heart-felt gratitude." "I expect I'll be getting that any minute," he quips. Instead, of course, Buffy snaps at him and they begin to bicker. Buffy storms off, looking smashing in her black turtleneck, long crucifix pendant, and fitted black leather duster. Spike hurries behind her, and when Buffy says she doesn't need a boyfriend or anyone else to rescue her, he sneers, "Don't need, or can't keep?" She calls him disgusting, but (yay) we're seeing a return of the old, nasty Spike and he keeps pace with her, suggesting various reasons why she can't keep a boyfriend. "Maybe your beauty's fading!" he cheerily suggests. "Things not as high, not as firm," he continues, making a lewd breast-cupping gesture. Hee! Instead of smacking him a good one, Buffy grits out, "You know what, Spike? The more I get to know you, the more I wish I didn't." Spike's not done with her yet and smugly replies, "Or maybe...you just don't hold their interest." He turns on his heel and walks away, leaving an exasperated Buffy behind him.

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Buffy the Vampire Slayer




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