Whoop! Whoop! Whoop! This has been a test of the Buffy Speech Alert broadcasting system. In the event of a real Buffy speech -- well, this one is, so duck and cover! She has the troops gathered in the living room, including Spike and Wood. How do you talk to an angel? Wait, that's not the right question. I meant "how do you recap a soliloquy?" Paraphrase or one long quote? Well, I'm not sure the writing is stirring enough here to warrant one long quote, so I'll summarize it. Buffy paces around the room and tells the assembled group that she hates being in this position; she hates that the Potentials have to be in this position, she hates that evil exists, she hates that she was chosen to fight it. Basically, she's a hater. She gets a smile from me, though, when she muses, "I know a lot of you wish that I hadn't been either." Shot of Kennedy and Rona (her arm in a cast) looking a little ashamed. However, Buffy believes they can "beat this evil," and she's offering the group a choice. She wants to go to the school the next morning and open the Hellmouth to finish this "once and for all." She realizes that they're wondering why it will be different this time. Hey, there's Vi, and she's wearing a silly scarf! Hence the nickname "Miss Minnesota," y'know. Buffy admits that none of the girls has the power that she and Faith have. She concludes, "So here's the part where you make a choice."

Sunnydale High School basement. Faith and Wood, wearing a mustard-yellow shirt that reminds me of Captain Kirk for some reason, move filing cabinets around to block ways out of the subbasement and into the sewers. This will drive all the Notsies "straight up into the school proper." Wood is assuming that the übervamps will be able to get past the Slayers, and Faith tells him, "C'mon, you gotta have a little faith." Groan. Wood rolls his eyes and snipes, "I think I've had my share, thanks." Faith admits that she left that one wide open. You'd think someone with a name like hers would've learned long ago not to provide that kind of set-up for a snark. Faith apologizes for "blowing [him] off" earlier, but admits that it was her intent. Wood had deduced that on his own, apparently. As they move more furniture in front of another vent, Faith explains that she's not interested in getting to know a guy after they've gotten "bouncy." Visions of Tigger bounce through my head, with Faith bouncing after him. My head can be a very scary place. As I'm sure you already know. To Wood, Faith's attitude sounds "bleak." In fact, he even thinks it sounds like "more defensive, isolationist Slayer crap." Cool. I like this conversation already. Wood tries to tell Faith that there are decent guys in the world who might surprise her given the chance, but she's not buying it, because she thinks her hotness blinds guys (and turns them into jerks subsequently, I guess). Leaning up against a file cabinet, Wood tells her, "Oh, please! I am so much prettier than you are." Faith doesn't even get the chance to protest what is obviously a stupefying assertion before Wood continues, "And for the record, our little encounter didn't exactly change my world." Oh, god -- then he says it was "nice" and gives Faith a smarmy thumbs-up for being so "enthused." Bwa! I really like post-jail Faith a lot, but it entertains the hell out of me to see her worldview rocked so expertly. And since Wood is quite a bit older than her, and her past encounters have likely been…brief, I believe what he's telling her. I also think he's hit on just the thing to keep her interested in him until he can get past her defenses. And because I like this scene so much, I'm just going to ignore how Faith's dialog gets all Yo! MTV Raps for no particular reason. I mean, "mad skillz"? Did Joss forget where Faith's from? Straight outta Compton. Straight outta Boston. I guess they sound a little alike. Anyway, Faith's boffing honor has been insulted, and she tells Wood, "We're going again, baby!" as she unbuckles her pants. He laughs and tells her, "Make me a deal. We live through this, you give me the chance to surprise you." They go back to moving furniture, bickering about who's prettier. I liked that scene. I'm not kidding here. I know it can be hard to tell.