Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Conversations With Dead People

Episode Report Card
Sep: A | 5 USERS: A+
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Conversations With Dead People

Back at the graveyard, Holden is still trying to jog Buffy's memory. No dice. At least, not until he mentions that he once dropped a lighting board on her foot. At this, Buffy's memory is awakened, probably thinking of her ruined footwear. They begin to catch up as if they were two normal classmates who hadn't seen each other in a couple of years. Their fight forgotten, they stroll through the cemetery. Holden says that he's "majoring in psych. Really liking that." Hee. His delivery is cracking me up. He mentions his internship at The Sunnydale Sanatorium For Residents Who Can't Handle The Awful Truth Of It All But Are Too Stupid To Move Away. He jokes that in Sunnydale, they need "a velvet rope and a bouncer." Holden morphs back into his human face and is briefly confused by the sensation. Buffy tells him that he has the ability to go back and forth between his human and vamp faces. Kind of like the Transformers. Now that I have had a chance to see him, I realize that Holden looks and sounds like a younger, cute Bill Murray. Did you notice the lack of R on the end of "cute"? Not a mistake.

Holden is all, "So I'm a vampire." Buffy offers her condolences for his tough break, but he assures her that he's feeling pretty good about it. Like he's "connected to a powerful, all-consuming evil that's going to suck the world into a fiery oblivion." Buffy mentions that she isn't really feeling connected to much of anything. Holden wonders what her deal is with the whole cross-and-stake accessorizing theme. Buffy reveals that she's the Slayer, and explains what that entails. Holden mentions that he heard a lot of rumors about Buffy back in high school days, ranging from "dating some really old guy" to "heavy religious," and then Scott Hope's pronouncement that she was a lesbian. Buffy is outraged until Holden reassures her that "he says that about every girl he breaks up with. And then! Last year, big surprise, he comes out." Which is such a total shout-out to the Couch Baron. Holden muses, "All that time you were a Slayer." Buffy's ego demands that he be corrected, in that she's "THE," not "A," Slayer. "So," responds Holden, stepping closer, "when you said 'not connected,' that was kind of a telling statement, wasn't it?" Buffy accuses him of Psych 101ing her and sarcasms, "What I really need is emotional therapy from the evil dead." Well, maybe not from a vampire, Buffy, but you should've been in therapy years ago. Buffy protests that she's "connected to a lot of people, okay?" The camera pans down to Buffy's cell phone, probably lost during the fight, ringing softly a few graves away. I know people have been clamoring for a long time that the Scoobs needed cell phones, but I would've been much happier if the show had just insinuated that cell phones don't work around the Hellmouth. I'm really not looking forward to eight thousand explanatory "why Buffy's cell phone isn't functional" scenes. So. Who wants to start the count of damaged and lost cell phones? Say it with me. Vone, vone, vone lost cell phone mwa ha ha.

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Buffy the Vampire Slayer

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