We open with a shot of Sars's new new boyfriend, D'Hoffryn. In a torch-lit chamber, he's telling Anya that she can't have her powers back, as she lost them as a result of her own carelessness. She tries to lean on her thousand-year vengeance track record, then whines that "now I'm stuck at Sunnydale High. Mortal. A child. And I'm flunking math." Hee. D'Hoffryn isn't impressed, saying she'll live out her mortal life and die. Fickle, those Lower Beings. She begs him to fold the fabric of time, and when he refuses, swears that "if you won't help me, by the pestilent gods I will find someone who will." She's going to ask the UPN higher-ups for help? She leaves.
Cut to Willow, on the high school lawn. She magically floats and spins a pencil as Buffy does sit-ups next to her. Buffy says that she and Faith have to take a series of mental and physical tests devised by the Watcher's Council. She compliments Willow on the pencil trick, and Willow says emotional control is the key to it. Buffy says she's going to train some more, because she wants to do -- "better than Faith?" Willow finishes. Buffy thinks she's being shallow, but Willow assures her the feeling is natural, and snarks that Buffy's got the psych part won. "Just don't mark the box that says 'I sometimes like to kill people.'" Worry about your own box, Willow. Ew, I squicked myself out. Buffy says that Faith isn't making the cover of Sanity Fair, but that she sympathizes with her, because she had it rough growing up. "Different circumstances, that could be me." Willow thinks that some people don't have that in them. The foreshadowing spans later in this episode to Season Six, and possibly beyond. It's nice, too, that they've shown us in "The Wish" that Buffy's self-analysis is correct. She apologizes for talking about Faith so much. Willow says it doesn't bother her, but Buffy directs her attention to the pencil, which is now spinning faster than a pinwheel in a hurricane. It finally lodges itself in a nearby tree. Buffy: "Emotional control?" Willow: "I'm workin' on it!" Yeah, you're sure to make Vulcan any day, dear. Credits.
Damon Wayans for 1-800-COLLECT. What a career sinkhole those commercials are.
Snyder's office. He's pontificating about a "marriage made in heaven." I guess that would make me Couch Giles. Or Giles would be Rupert Baron. Oh, he's actually talking about Percy and Willow. Well, that would leave Oz free, in case Giles won't have me, so I'm in favor. He explains that Willow is the pinnacle of academic achievement, "despite her unsavory associations." I didn't know Willow was an NRA member. He continues that Percy is a basketball star. Willow is confused. Percy is asleep. Snyder reiterates that they're a perfect match. Willow: "You want us to breed?" Willow, you could do a lot worse; I'm just saying. But no, Snyder wants Willow to tutor Percy, because he's flunking history. Percy: "I'm challenged." Snyder: "You're lazy, self-involved and spoiled. That's quite the challenge." Hee. Snyder goes on that the school can't afford to have a losing year in basketball, especially after the previous year's "debacle" with the swim team. I appreciate the continuity, even if involves an episode I'd love to forget (and dread the prospect of recapping). Willow tries to protest. Snyder: "Rosenberg, it's time to give something back to the community. I know you want to help your school out here. Ask me how I know." Willow starts to do just that. Snyder: "I just know." I adore Snyder so much that I offer this little paean in remembrance of him: