Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Doublemeat Palace

Episode Report Card
Ace: C+ | 2 USERS: B-
Buffy's got a job!

Cut to the alley. Gary is taking out the trash -- or going out to have sex with Spike, I'm really not sure. There's a rumbling behind the trashcan. Gary calls out, "Is someone there?" Uh oh. It's monster-cam. I sense that things will not go well for Gary. He seems to recognize whomever he sees and is genuinely unafraid until, for some reason, he starts screaming. His little hat flies off and hits the pavement while the camera follows. Hey, at least you can't hear the background music over the screaming. I'll have to try a few ritual sacrifices next time the score really gets on my nerves.

Next morning. Buffy clocks in. Creepy coworker seems surprised to see her. "You came back," he monotones. She's again startled by Manny, who tells her that Gary is missing, so that means Buffy is on grill. Buffy tries to convince him that Gary's coming back, but Manny, it seems, is used to these mysterious disappearances. Buffy protests that she doesn't know how to grill. "Just think," says Manny with what almost looks like a smile. "This is the last day you'll ever be able to say that." HA!

Buffy. Grill. Again with the buttons and the waaaay overdone instructions. Mmmm. Let's watch all that meat cook. On second thought, let's not. Let's shut our eyes and give our stomachs a little breather. Buffy again asks about the secret ingredient, and is again stonewalled with the "meat process. It's a process that they do to the meat" answer. Gratuitous meat shot. Grill guy is creepy. He says "nostrils" funny, like "nosss-trillls." He has grease in his ears. Why the HELL am I recapping this? Buffy is called away from the grill by Manny. She's already been chosen as a winner in the double-shift sweepstakes. Manny attempts to pacify her with the offer of "an extra free Doublemeat Medley." Which I guess could mean that Buffy was giving Xander one of the meals she gets for free earlier, so he wasn't a big mooch. In keeping with the focus on minutia this episode has inspired, Sep tells me that California actually has laws regarding overtime and that Buffy would be compensated at 1.5 times her normal rate of pay for hours over eight and up to twelve, and at 2.0 times her normal rate of pay for anything over twelve hours in a single day. Ah, that Sep. Such a font of useless information. But we love her anyway. Buffy argues a little, but is interrupted by the arrival of the meat. No, not Spike. One of her coworkers slams a big bag of meat process on the table next to her. Ominous.

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Buffy the Vampire Slayer




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