Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Doublemeat Palace

Episode Report Card
Ace: C+ | 2 USERS: B-
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Buffy's got a job!

At Xanya's, Hallie spoons something (I was going to say sugar, but it's never safe to assume with demons) into her tea and asks Anya to tell her more about Xander. Anya seems a little disturbed by her friend's curiosity and asks, "Do you think I'm making a mistake?" When Hallie replies, "Do you?" Anya protests that she's very happy with Xander and gives a list of his attributes: kind, brave, nice smile, nice body, and he loves her. "Sometimes it isn't easy, but he does [love me]," Anya concludes. Hallie incredulously asks, "Who told you that it isn't easy to love you?" Weeeeell, this is a little interesting. I'd be a lot more interested if this conversation had happened last year, and if I cared at all about Anya and Xander as characters anymore, but still, it seems like we might actually get an acknowledgement of Xander's low-level disdain for his girlfriend here. Anya attempts to explain how Xander admonishes her, and then asks Hallie, "Do you think there's something wrong with the way he treats me?" Sounding an awful lot like therapists I have known, Hallie then replies, "Do you?" This agitates Anya a little, and she protests that she loves Xander and he doesn't actually think he knows better than her. Hallie says she understands, and that Anya need not discuss it any further if she's "not comfortable." What a manipulator she is! "It's not like I'm hiding any deficiencies or anything," protests Anya, to which Hallie just replies, "Hmm!"

Xander and Dawn are playing Go Fish at Der Zauber Kasten when Buffy shows up and tosses some wrapped fast food on the table in front of them. She's pissy because she called an emergency meeting and only ended up with Dawn and Xander. I guess I'd be pissy too. Heh. Low blow, but too easy to pass up. Buffy, who has changed into a cute outfit of a black muscle t-shirt and black pants, wants to know where Willow and Anya are. Dawn explains that she knocked on Willow's door but didn't get an answer, and of course we all know where Anya is at the moment. Not even displaying any interest in Buffy's emergency, Xander just wants to talk about whether Buffy ever saw Anya with her true vengeance demon face. He's creeped out by Hallie's appearance. Buffy ignores all this blather (and really, since Anya is human now, it should hardly matter to Xander what she used to look like) and just snaps, "There's something wrong at the Doublemeat Palace. Really wrong!" Buffy flounces over to the counter; Dawn follows, wondering why Buffy smells funny. Dawn guesses that Buffy's been fighting a demon, but it's actually Doublemeat stench. Buffy sniffs her hair and rants about how she just tried to do something normal, get a normal job, and instead she ended up right back where she started, "Blood and death and funky smells." She digs around in her purse and pulls out a paper napkin. Inside is the severed carrot, which she just shows to Dawn, grumping, "Look what I found, near the grinder." Dawn is disgusted, and I'm skeptical that the finger, which has left a bloody smear on the napkin, would still be bleeding, like, twenty-four hours after it was cut off. Buffy explains that she thinks the finger might be Gary's and that he might have been ground up as the secret ingredient in the Doublemeat beef patty. She proposes that they analyze the burger she's brought to see if it contains "people." "What? People?" says Xander with his mouth full, and swallows hard. Oops -- he can't believe he ate the whole thing. Buffy and Xander bicker about him having eaten her evidence, and he's hurt that she's not more concerned that he just downed a whole bunch of people parts.

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Buffy the Vampire Slayer

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