Anya pipes up that she's not Buffy's friend, and gets an angry, "Then why are you here? Aside from getting rescued, what is it that you do?" in reply. I'm really totally baffled as to what Buffy's point is here. "Pony up supernatural powers or leave"? People now have to possess superpowers to hang with The Great And Mighty Buff? Why doesn't she just toss Anya, Xander, Dawn, and the Junior Misses all out on their ears, then? Anya says she's there to "provide much needed sarcasm," but Xander thinks that's his role. I believe the real Xander and Anya have died, and their Sarcasm Calling has passed on to Ace and me. Buffy says Anya (and the others?) are there because they're scared, thus dismissing the seven years of bravery Willow and Xander have shown fighting at her side. She tells the room that they can be scared, but they should "be useful while [they're] at it." Has she given them commands that have gone unfulfilled? Is that why she's pissed? Argh. Willow claims that everyone is doing their best. Buffy says that's not enough, because the First knows their capabilities and is already laughing at them. I'm pretty much laughing right back at it, Buffy. As you should be. But no, Buffy wants everyone to surprise themselves by doing even more than they're capable of. There's a long pause, and Spike stirs. He sighs and starts to leave the room, but is stopped by Buffy demanding, "Where are you going?" Spike looks around and smirks that Buffy's speech obviously doesn't apply to him. As he walks away, she shoots after him, "Fine. Take a cell phone. That way if I need someone to get weepy or wailed on, I can call you." Ouch! Spike's pissed, but Buffy shrugs that he's been "holding back" since he returned with his soul. Spike admits that he doesn't relish the kill as much these days, and Buffy sneers, "You were a better fighter then." "I did this for you," explodes Spike, and it's my turn to sigh, because I thought we already went over this in "Beneath You." Spike says he changed because Buffy wanted him to be different, and Buffy's face gets incredibly mean and ugly as she shouts that she wants a dangerous killer Spike, not a wimpy nice one. Looks like Buffy's now done with destroying everyone in the room, though, and she tells Dawn to put the Junior Misses to bed and bring her the Slayer Emergency Kit. What was that about how Buffy has to do everything around the place again? Bitch won't even fetch her own heirloom.
Later, in the living room. Wood, at Buffy's invitation, has joined Buffy, Xander, Anya, Kennedy, Willow, and Dawn in opening the Slayer Emergency Kit. Buffy snaps the lock off the mystery box in the bottom of the bag, and Xander pulls out a bunch of metal things. Dawn is suddenly able to read the book from the bag, which is in Sumerian, and thinks they're dealing with "an origin myth. The story of the very first Slayer." Miss Forgets-A-Lot now remembers that she dreamed of the First Slayer "the other night." She didn't, however, remember that dream when she saw Dead Chloe in the bathroom earlier. Oh, yeah, you're really carrying everybody else, Buffy. And what a fine job you're doing. The screen goes black until it's illuminated by the flame of a single match. Xander lights some sort of oil lamp whose wide, flat base has a spiral pattern carved into it. Already this scene has a creepier vibe than most of the season. Dawn, reading from the large and helpful instruction manual included in the kit, instructs Xander to take one of the…um, okay. I have a problem. What the hell do you call these things? I know the internet is a generally a boon to the slow-witted such as myself, but how do you even do a search on "those cut-out stencil-y things that cast shadows when illuminated from behind"? I'm going to draw on my extensive linguistic knowledge here and call them doohickeys.