Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Graduation Day, Part I

Episode Report Card
admin: A | 1 USERS: A-
YOU GRADE IT
Shoot That Poisoned Arrow

The camera pans across a pile of maroon caps and gowns and finally comes to rest on Xander and Cordelia, who are signing up to get their grad gear. Cordy gripes because she had lobbied for the "teal," which just goes to show that growing up rich doesn't guarantee good taste. And speaking of good taste, or rather the opposite, I'm horribly riveted by Xander's sweater, which appears to be made of two mismatched halves cobbled together in the dark by a blind, loopy grandma. Xander says he thinks the maroon "has more dignity," and Cordy snarks that Xander and dignified clothes haven't ever been introduced. I guess she noticed the sweater. Xander has to poop on Cordy's superiority party by telling her he has a feeling he's going to die before graduating. All around them, other students are chatting, smiling, and signing yearbooks. Cordy: bitchy comment. Xander: No, really, "my number's up." Cordy: bitchy statement.

Willow is standing on the stairs when Harmony comes gallomping down, yearbook in hand. Apparently, the words "second to last day of school" inspired in Harmony thoughts of Hee Haw, since she's wearing a vacuum-sealed top and pants made out of red handkerchief material. Huh, Harmony is suddenly reminding me of Donna Martin. And I think Beverly Hills 90210 really missed out on an exciting plot line when they chose to not have Donna become an undead creature of the night and eat David, the groom, at their nauseating storybook wedding. Wills and Harms sign each other's yearbook, and Harmony almost totally sincerely says she wishes she and Willow had gotten to "know each other better." Willow agrees and Harmony takes her leave, hoping they don't lose touch. You don't know the half of it, sweet thing. Wearing a very skeptical face, Buffy comes to stand beside Willow. "Don't you hate her?" inquires Buffy. Willow allows that she does: "She picked on me for ten years! The vacuous tramp." Hee hee. I love that line and Alyson's delivery. Willow tries to explain that she's missing high school already, but Buffy's not feeling the love-in vibe. She sulks that she might not attend the ceremony and flops into a chair while Willow has a nostalgic moment with the soda machine. That's the Willow I used to love. Thanks a whole freakin' lot for killing everything good abut her during seasons four and five, Joss. Buffy explains she wants to skip graduation in order to fight the Mayor, and Xander wanders into the conversation. He asks the girls to guess who their commencement speaker will be, and after Willow proposes Siegfried, Roy, and one of the tigers, Xander drops his bombshell. Not literally. Just a figure of speech. Anyway, it turns out that Buffy will be able to multi-task graduation and evil fightage, since the Mayor is their commencement speaker. Whoops, serendipity.

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Buffy the Vampire Slayer

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