Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Buffy the Vampire Slayer

Episode Report Card
Ace: C+ | 1209 USERS: C+
YOU GRADE IT
A Match Made In Sunnydale

Buffy rips the bottom of her dress to allow her more freedom of movement. Oh, don't do that, Buffy! Now you'll never be able to wear it again later. Overcoat Oldster gets Anya in a headlock, and at that moment Xander returns. Buffy deals with the demon while Anya tries to explain that it's all been a huge, wacky, Sunnydale-style misunderstanding. Xander still seems troubled. Buffy is in the midst of dispatching the demon, aided by the bridal veil from atop the stuffed bison, when Xander breaks in to administer a hearty whack with a decorative pillar. He finishes by smashing the pillar down hard on what we are to assume is the demon's head, although though the next long shot shows it to be intact. "It's dead," observes Xander. "Yup," agrees Buffy. Friends and family are united in their cheers, but I feel a little strange that they just up and killed an unarmed demon, who wasn't even a very effective fighter despite being about nine feet tall. When the body doesn't do them the favor of disappearing, Willow suggests that they cover it with flowers. Heh. Mr. Harris, always with the wonderful timing, insists that he's not paying for the damages, and it's the fault of all the "FREAKS!" A rematch of the earlier brawl looks imminent, but Anya tells everyone to sit down and shut up, because it's time for the freakin' wedding.

In the foyer, Anya notices Xander's glum expression. She's ready to get married, but Xander has reservations. "I'm not ready," he confesses shakily. Anya blinks a lot and makes fish faces. "But it wasn't real," reasons Anya. Xander thinks that the fact that it could be real is what matters. Anya blinks a lot and makes fish faces. She tries to tell him that if he just calms down, they can start again. Over her shoulder, Xander sees his dad berating his mom, an ugly expression on his face. "We can't start over. If this is a mistake, it's forever. And I don't want to hurt you. Not that way," declares Xander. Anya blinks a lot and makes fish faces. I think she's supposed to be crying, but she just looks like her eyes are too big for her sockets. Xander apologizes. Anya wipes away her tears and turns around. She slowly wanders up the aisle, her pain plain on her face, as the orchestra starts up with the wedding processional. Xander -- well, Xander just takes off, because he's a crapweasel who can't even help his fiancée call off the wedding. God! Why is this happening? Why did I have to sit through all the wedding crap, and all the planning for all the wedding crap, if they aren't even going to get married? The worst part is that it could all start over at any moment. Next season could be wacky wedding hijinx redux, for all we know. I can't tell you what this has done to me. I get twitchy at the sight of tulle. If I go out to dinner with my friends and people don't immediately decide where they are going to sit, I have a mini-breakdown. I got an invitation to a party the other day, and I had to sit down and breathe into a paper bag calmly and slowly for five full minutes before I could even bring myself to open it, because it looked like it could be a wedding invitation. I have post-traumatic recapping syndrome, and it ain't pretty, people.

Buffy the Vampire Slayer

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