Buffy the Vampire Slayer

Episode Report Card
Sep: C | 6 USERS: B+
Domo arigato, Buffy Roboto

Glory's lair. The minions make excuses. Cut to the hallway. Fake, fake, incredibly fake, the aural equivalent of Fake the Snake fake, minion screams come from off-screen.

Der Zauber Kasten. The Buffybot is slumped over the table while Willow tries to repair her. Because that's what you do when a fuck bunny built in your graven image by your former archenemy who has a frightening obsession with you breaks. Not. In other words, another stupid plot contrivance. One that makes me think that the Buffybot is going to show up again. Xander and Giles enter, and Buffy wants to know if they dusted Spike. I want to know how they got him out of there without it turning into combustion junction. Good thing we had all those oh-so-necessary extended remixes of Spike/'bot pillow talk. Anyway, Xander and Giles had an attack of conscience, because he was too badly beaten for them to find out what he told Glory. Buffy worries that Glory could be on her way right now. Giles notices Dawn's frightened look and assures her that everyone is perfectly safe. "We're safe. Right. And Spike built a robot Buffy to play checkers with," Dawn dryly observes. Tara offers, "It sounded convincing when I thought it." Heh. Willow calls their attention to the 'bot, showing them a couple of fried wires and commenting, "It's an easy fix." Yet again making me think that we're going to see the Buffybot again. Xander (Xander! Is nothing sacred?) actually expresses a bit of sympathy for Spike. Buffy reacts with anger at first, but then looks contemplative when Xander tells her how "thrashed" Spike looked.

Spike crypt. Buffy enters, pretending to be Buffybot. At Buffy's greeting, Spike sits up, and he does look pretty damn awful what with his eye all swelled shut. "Buffybot" wants to know why he let Glory beat the everlasting crap out of him, and he tells her that it was because Glory wanted to know who the Key is. Buffy cheerily offers to tell Glory, but Spike interrupts her with a forceful "NO!" Because, you see, if Glory finds out about the key, that would destroy the "other, not so pleasant" Buffy, and Spike would rather die than have that happen. So Buffy kisses him. And I understand that she's trying to show her gratitude here; we're probably all grateful that he didn't rat Dawn out. (Well, except for me, because I was hoping to see Spike return from his Snackwell brand of evil ways.) But Buffy? Damn, girl. Say it with Hallmark like the rest of us. After a moment, Spike pulls back, realizing that these are not robot lips. He starts to explain about the 'bot, but Buffy cuts him off, saying, "That thing. It wasn't even real." She starts to leave, but pauses and, with her back turned to Spike, says, "What you did for me and Dawn. That was real." She promises that she won't forget it, then walks out, leaving half the audience cheering and doing little dances and the other half fuming and getting out their voodoo dolls.

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Buffy the Vampire Slayer




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