Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Lessons

Episode Report Card
Sep: B- | 2 USERS: B+
YOU GRADE IT
Golden rule days
Upstairs, she gives Shiny and the Whiners some last-minute advice. Kit hugs Buffy, but Carlos quickly puts his foot in it by saying, "You are the coolest mom ever." Dawn springs into action, giving Buffy a quick kiss on the cheek and leading her band of misfits away. On cue, Principal Wood appears on the scene. Doesn't this guy have an office? The one on the Hellmouth, for instance? He notes that he observed Buffy getting Kit and Carlos to actually attend class. Principal Wood surprises Buffy by offering her a job as the school's new community outreach person non-counselor…thingy. Buffy's face lights up, and she readily accepts. He wants to make sure that she heard the bit about the payment not even being enough money to fold, but she assures him that she'll work it into her schedule.

Cut to Spike, hugging himself on the ground and mumbling. 'Cause he's a big crazy. He's fretting a "she" that "won't understand." Suddenly Warren walks into the frame, saying, "Of course she won't understand. I'm beyond her understanding…I'm more than that. More than flesh." Warren morphs into Glory. Hold up! Warren is Glory? I thought Ben was Glory. Glory continues the mysterious exposition, but in her own style, saying, "I don't think there's a human word fabulous enough for me." Glory morphs into Adam. Adam is still boring, and therefore doesn't get recapped. Adam leans down and transmutates into the Mayor. "So what'd you think? You'd get your soul back and everything will be jim-dandy?" The Mayor reminds Spike that a soul is more slippery than "a greased weasel," and that's why Mayor Wilkins sold his. At this point, I'm wondering who will represent evil from Season Two. Angel has his own show now and is therefore too important to be part of Spike's psychosis. Ah, it's Dru. She reminds Spike that he'll always be "in the dark with [her] singing our little songs." I'm momentarily distracted by what those little songs might be. I can kinda see Spike riffing on the Ramones -- "twenny twenny twenny four hours to go. I'm gonna eat the Slayer" -- but that's not really Dru's taste. The Master is next in the line-up to tell us that we're going "right back to the beginning. The true beginning." He warns that we're all "going to learn something about ourselves in the process. You'll learn that you're a pathetic schmuck." Hee! Someone is speaking my language. "It's not about right. It's not about wrong." Pan up on a black-clad Buffy, who finishes, "It's about power." Ooh. This might be interesting.

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Buffy the Vampire Slayer

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