Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Buffy the Vampire Slayer

Episode Report Card
Ace: D | 786 USERS: C+
YOU GRADE IT
Never Kill A Boy On The First Date

A short bus drives along a dark street. Most of the passengers doze, except a small boy playing with a toy plane. In the back of the bus, a menacing guy with bad facial hair spouts what sounds like Biblical passages. He's obviously a few steps short of a staircase.

Buffy enters the Bronze and looks around for Owen. She spots him dancing with Cordelia, who is running her hands up and down his arms. Putting Cordy right next to Owen like that just makes it all the more obvious that the only way they're even believable as high-school age is if they've lived every day twice. Buffy stares, and then turns and leaves the club.

In the bus, the scary guy walks up the aisle and preaches about Judgement Day or some other TV crazy-talk. The bus driver tells him to sit down, and while he's distracted with the scary guy, a vampire steps out into the road. The bus hits the vampire and then swerves off the road, finally plowing into a telephone pole. The driver checks if his passengers are okay, and then goes out to check on the man he hit. He kneels to check the victim but is grabbed by the throat. More vampires move into the bus and screams are heard.

Next day at school, Buffy has explained the situation to Xander and slams her locker shut in frustration. Well, however much we like to complain about the clothes in the fourth season, at least the cast isn't costumed in spandex anymore. Blue spandex. In this case, a blue, faux-velvet, spandex tank-top with a tie-dyed target over the breasts and bra cups showing in the arm holes. And that's not even mentioning the extremely high waisted, wide legged pants. Buffy explains that she left without talking to Owen because she couldn't think of a good explanation for her lateness. Xander tells Buffy she could date any guy in the school, but she seems fixated on Owen. At that moment, Owen walks up and asks Buffy where she was the night before. She gives him a lame excuse about her watch breaking, which he understands. He asks her again to meet at the Bronze, and then romantically gives her his pocket watch so she can make it on time. Xander glumly stares at his plastic Tweety Bird watch. Buffy tries to feel Owen out (not like that! God, get your minds out of the gutter) about him and Cordelia, but Owen describes Cordy as "grabby," which earns him a date with Buffy. Buffy swoons off and Xander glums some more.

Giles is in his library office when Buffy bursts in, checking to see if Giles has made any developments in the Anointed One thing. She doesn't give him a chance to speak, but lets herself off the hook for patrol and rushes out of his office. "She is the strangest girl," muses Giles.

Buffy the Vampire Slayer

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