Nighttime. Buffy enters Spike's crypt as he comes up from the basement. When he sees her, he snarks, "The sun sets and she appears." I like that line much more than the song that follows it. It feels like an aside from a Shakespeare play almost, and I think it would have been cool if he'd delivered it directly to the audience. Spike claims that although he's seen a "six-hundred-pound demon making like Yma Sumac," he's immune to the singing sweeping Sunnydale. He offers her a drink, which Buffy declines with a tiny shudder. She asks if he knows the cause and Spike sulks, "Oh. So that's all. You've just come to pump me for information." "What else would I want to pump you for?" queries Buffy, and then she and I both spend a moment being grossed out. Apparently Spike's fed up that a pretty girl he's in love with is hanging around him all the time, though, so he pointedly holds the door open and tells her that he doesn't have information.
Ace: Oh, poor Spike. It must be so awful for him that Buffy only seeks him out for friendship-type purposes. I guess it's not enough that he gets to be around the woman he loves, she has to love him back or he gets all pissy.
Sep: My God! Do you know what that means?! Spike hasn't turned into Brad at all -- he's turned into RILEY! It all makes sense, the schmoopification, my total lack of interest in the character. They must have switched bodies at some point and now Spike is partying down in Belize ripping out throats and being evil.
Ace: Yeah! But uh, Riley never was one for the snark, so how's he pulling off that aspect of Spike's personality?
Sep: It's the bleach. Most definitely the bleach.
Ace: Hee. No wait, I know! He's been poking around in the crypt and he found Spike's old diaries. He's been using them for snarky, semi-reformed evil pointers.
Sep: (puts on Spike-y accent) "Met this great chick Drusilla. I really, really like her. I hope it works out. I can tell this Angel bloke and I are going to be bestest of friends."
Ace: You know, I think it's only your rich fantasy life and your opportunity to communicate it through recaps that's sustaining your interest in the show at this point.
Sep: It was choice between that or hard drugs and drinking.
Ace: Oh, so sorry -- other recappers have already cornered and perfected that schtick. You'll have to get something else, dude.