Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Phases

Episode Report Card
Couch Baron: B+ | 4 USERS: A-
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All About Oz

Full moon. Flashlight in hand, Giles strolls around what's obviously a makeout site. Giles, my car's the next one over. He catches sight of Buffy, and asks her if she saw anything. She excitedly relays some scandalous gossip about two kids (one named "Owen," although I don't know if that's the same Owen from "Never Kill A Boy On The First Date") but at a look from Giles, she says she hasn't spotted the werewolf. Giles suggests they knock on a few windows and ask if anyone's seen anything. Buffy duhs, "Giles, no one's seen anything." Hee. They split up again. Buffy pauses, hears something at her feet, and is suddenly swept up into a large net. Some dude that bears a passing resemblance to a younger Paul Gleason emerges from the bushes, points a gun at her, and says, "Gotcha!" "Gotcha"? Dude, you need to take a class in remedial exclamations, methinks. Leave "Gotcha!" in the eighties where it belongs. Along with Anthony Edwards.

After the break, the dude realizes that he hasn't captured his intended prey, while Buffy calls for Giles. He appears, and raises his hands when the dude trains the gun on him. He says his name's Cain (What. Ever.) and that he'll ask the questions. He does, however, let Buffy down, but then makes some comments implying that Buffy and Giles are engaged in a May-December romance. Giles is appalled, as am I. He'd never get involved with anyone under the age of, say, thirty-three. Giles starts toward him, but Buffy holds him back and tells "Repulso-Brain" that they're simply hunting werewolves. I refuse to call this guy Cain, and Repulso-Brain is too long to type, so I think I'll settle for "UnAbel." UnAbel chuckles at the idea of the two of them hunting werewolves. Displaying a necklace made out of large teeth, he boasts that he took one from each werewolf he killed, and that the one he's currently pursuing will bring the total to twelve. Buffy and Giles are shocked that he kills them, but he sleazes that their pelts are worth a lot of money in Sri Lanka (again, whatever) and that it's hard to skin them while they're alive. He blathers some Whatever Exposition about werewolves being attracted to sexual heat, and if his prey isn't at their current location, it'll have found someplace similar. Buffy plays dumb, but after UnAbel oozes away, she says she thinks she knows where the werewolf is heading. Hooters?

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Buffy the Vampire Slayer

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