Buffy the Vampire Slayer
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Episode Report Card
Ace: C- | 2 USERS: A-
YOU GRADE IT
Thoroughly Modern Millie

Nursery for Nervous Nellies. Buffy opens the front door and is immediately enveloped by multiple voices yelling over each other in the living room. Chairs are knocked over. Throw pillows have been thrown. Frames are askew. Why are frames askew? Who knows. Maybe Vi has OCD and Rona tilted everything in order to get her goat. Xander, Rona, Vi, and Andrew stand in a circle and yell while Buffy waits in the background with arms crossed. "I was only gone a couple of hours," says she as soon as the ruckus dies down. Before she can assign anyone a time-out, Willow rushes down the stairs with news from the British coven. Buffy hauls her off to have a powwow. The older and arguably more mature Scoobs sit around the dining room table as Willow reveals that the coven has found another Junior Miss -- right there in Sunnydale! Well, at least that cuts down on the commute time. But why can't everyone else go and pick up the Chinese one in Shanghai and have Giles and Anya track down the Junior Miss in Sunnydale? I wanted to try my hand at making up imaginary Giles/Anya love themes like Sep did last week. "All these girls flock into town and this one's already here right under our noses," sighs Anya, obviously deeply missing her huggle-honey Giles (I'll take my opportunities where I can find them). Wait a sec! Is that Andrew in the background? Why? Why is he here? In this scene. On the show. WHY? And why are they trying to give him funny lines and make him likeable? This is the same sniveling little weasel whom we saw cheer Warren on to annihilate Buffy when Warren was briefly invincible last season. I've hated Andrew and his pinched little face ever since then, I've seen nothing to indicate that I should rethink my position now, and I resent that the writers seem to think that I should.

Okay. Back to what's passing for a plot. Xander is miffed that the seers weren't able to find any identifying information. "Am I getting the definition of seer wrong?" This new development throws a wrench in Buffy's plans to take the Junior Misses out on a field trip that night. Willow offers to do a locating spell for the eighty-seventh episode in a row, but Buffy is still unsure if she should go. Dawn is all, "You have more important things to do," but she says it in a self-pitying way. Buffy ignores her, as do the viewers. The Action Monkeys peep in from the kitchen, and I give them the go-ahead. They surround Dawn, slapping at her and pulling her hair.

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Buffy the Vampire Slayer

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