Buffy the Vampire Slayer
School Hard

Episode Report Card
Couch Baron: A | 9 USERS: A-
YOU GRADE IT
...With A Vengeance

Spike approaches the Anointed One, saying he's read about him, and introduces himself. A henchvamp, whose right eye is so displaced I'm going to call him Mad-Eye Henchvamp, gets in his face, but Spike just smirks and ignores him. He goes on that he knows about the A.O.'s Slayer problem. "Do you know what I find works real good with Slayers? Killing them." A lesson that many villains on this show would do well to learn. The A.O. asks if he can do it. Spike says he's killed a couple Slayers, but he doesn't like to brag. After a beat, he continues, "Who am I kidding. I love to brag!" Man alive, he was hot even in vamp face back then. He starts to tell the tale about the Boxer Rebellion Slayer, but we see that Dru is walking up behind him, dressed in a Gothic white nightie-like dress. Spike turns his head to her and morphs to his human visage, saying she shouldn't be walking around, as she's weak. Dru asks if the A.O. & Co. are nice "people," and Spike says they're getting along. Dru, stepping toward the A.O., says she can feel his power. You're the only one, sister. She asks him if he likes daisies, and goes on that she plants them, but they always die. "Everything I put in the ground withers and dies." Oh, so Dru put just about every good thing about this show in the ground! That explains an awful lot. Buffy's spunkiness? In the ground! Willow's personality? In the ground! Any sort of enjoyable group dynamic? In the bloody ground! Back in the Shangri-La of Season Two, the A.O. is clearly discomfited by Crazy Daisy Lady. Looking skyward, Dru says that she's cold, and Spike gives her his duster. I swoon. She crazies that she's a princess, and Spike happily agrees. She runs a fingernail down his cheek, drawing blood, and laps it up, bringing exchange of bodily fluids to a whole new level of "ew." They lean in to kiss, but before their lips meet, they slowly turn to regard their audience, smiling all Sid and Nancy. Spike menaces that he and Dru are moving in, and if anyone wants to test who's got "the biggest wrinklies," to step up. He tells the A.O. that he'll kill the Slayer in exchange for the A.O. keeping his "flunkies" off Spike's back. The A.O. agrees. The flunkies groan in disappointment. Dru loons that she can't see the Slayer. "It's dark where she is. Kill her, Spike. Kill her for princess?" Spike says it's as good as done, and Dru calls him her "sweet." Aw. Look at the cute, photogenic, really really evil vampires! As I said, I fell in love with Spike immediately, and I liked Dru quite a bit at first too, until she got all Angelus-happy. Spike and Dru gaze adoringly at each other, then turn back to the A.O. Spike asks him about the Slayer. "Is she tough?" I don't know, but your butchering of your accent there was, James honey.

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Buffy the Vampire Slayer

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