Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Smashed

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Smashed

Downstairs, Amy is munching cookies and watching TV. Where's Dawn during all this? Scratch that. I actually don't care. Amy expresses sympathy about Buffy's mom and then reviews some of the shocking things that happened in Sunnydale while she was ratty. "People getting frozen, Willow's dating girls, and did you hear about Tom and Nicole?" she concludes. Nothing in the list is news to Buffy except the people-getting-frozen part, so her ears perk up at that. Amy gestures to the TV, where a newscaster stands in front of an ambulance, speaking about a robbery which left one man "in critical yet stable condition." Behind him, some EMTs carry a gurney into the museum.

Outside the museum, a large crowd has gathered. Buffy hops up and down behind them trying to get a better view, then finally pushes her way to the front. As she looks on, the EMTs roll Rusty out of the museum on a dolly. Guess they decided not to use that gurney after all. I was going to complain about the amount of time it must have taken Buffy to get to the museum, and how the EMTs would have had time to remove Rusty before she got there, but then I decided that they spent all this time looking for the dolly after it became clear that the gurney wouldn't work out. I mean, obviously. See, like Ace says -- a clear explanation for everything.

Buffy moseys off. As she crosses the museum lawn, she runs into Spike (not literally, though. And none of her mouth parts get stuck on his mouth parts). Spike jibes her a little about getting there late, but Buffy seems to have no patience for him after their earlier exchange. He suggests that they work on the freezing case together, but Buffy's incredible rolling eyes advertise her reluctance and the fact that she's just about to walk away. Spike tags along, and when Buffy tells him their working together "never ends well," he replies, "It did the other night." We've done this scene what feels like an excruciating eight million times, so I'm sure it comes as no surprise to my gentle readers that Buffy is dismissive at this point. "I'm sorry if you thought that it meant more," she lies. "Lies," because I don't think she's really that sorry at all. She just wants him to stop talking at her all the time. She fishes about for an explanation and finally says, "When I kissed you, you know I was thinking about Giles, right?" I actually laughed out loud at this line the first time I saw the episode. I mean, I thought she was teasing him and it seemed like a hilarious things to say. Spike beetles his brow: "You know, I always wondered about you two." I can't tell if he's serious -- I don't think I've ever seen Spike make that thoughtful, broody face before. However, he is breathing very heavily like he's very upset. Buffy is disgusted by the thought of her and Giles that way (maybe she needs to have a little talk with Anya, hmm?) and clarifies that she kissed Spike because she was sad about Giles leaving. That's just lame. He asks if she's managed to convince herself that the kissing was such a bad idea. Buffy says, "Please. Stop," in a very serious tone, and begins to walk away. You know, if Buffy said that to me in that tone, I'd comply. She seems to be at the end of her rope, and pissing off the Slayer just isn't a good idea. Spike's nothing if not persistent, though, so he follows after her, insisting, "A man can change!" Buffy turns on him: "You're not a man. You're a thing." Spike looks hurt. You know, in my opinion, Spike deserves so much punishment and suffering for his years of unregretful evil. And while I don't want Buffy to be the one who dishes it out, and particularly not between bouts of smoochies, it's hard for me to feel very sorry for Spike here. He has his un-life, which is more than you can say for his victims. Buffy turns away again, but Spike grabs her shoulder hard, spinning her around. Ruh roh! I've been watching those repeats on FX, and Buffy does not react well to being touched in anger. Which is to say, she punches him in the face. Spike immediately hits her back, knocking her to the ground, and as she recovers, he seems to stop and think. After a pause, he grabs his head in a show of pain. Buffy strides over and knocks him down. "You're a thing. An evil disgusting thing." She walks away. Not nice to hit the semi-defenseless guy, Buffy. Guess he should have stopped bugging when you said "please." Spike looks up, the camera pulls in close, and then Spike gives an evil, suggestive smile. Watch it in slo-mo, because the degree to which James Marsters can suck in his already defined cheeks is amazing.

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Buffy the Vampire Slayer

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