Andrew is in the kitchen along with a jumble of Junior Misses, Willow, and Xander. Rona gripes about low-fat milk, Willow and Kennedy pour cereal, and Millie does something strange with a paper towel and a spoon. We switch back and forth between the Nerd Cam and the normal camera. Andrew focuses in on Xander and says they'll be filming a special piece on Xander later, "the man who is the heart of the Slayer machine." Xander looks extraordinarily pleased and smiles, and I'm smiling along with him until I catch sight of the chewed cereal in his mouth. Ew, that's a little too Method for me. Andrew cruises through the kitchen, narrating about the air being "filled with foreboding," but is interrupted by Dawn reminding Anya that they're out of raisin bran. Actually, that would fill me with foreboding too. Gotta have my raisin bran in the morning. Starts the day off right. Well, gotta have my raisin bran and my coffee. But the coffee is more of an addiction thing and we all know that leads to flaying and phallic-temple-raising, so I don't like to discuss it. Hey, I had that first cup of French Market a few years ago and then I got addicted, the way addicts do. Maybe it was the chicory? I've heard some call it the devil's weed. Anyway, so I have my dark coffee addiction, but once I get around to going all murdery I'm sure there's a shiny redemption arc in my future. I've made sure not to sleep with any Slayers, though, because I want the redemption arc with horsies and duster-wearing Giles in England rather than the one with odiferous craziness, basement dwelling, and torture. ["Hey, we re-carpeted your office at TWoP Towers after that obelisk poked through the floor and got you your own French press. Don't get greedy." -- Sars]
Speaking of such, Buffy and Spike enter the kitchen, and Spike's hitting the 'ludes and Jack D. so hard this week that I can't understand a single thing he slurs out. Through the miracle of closed captioning, I can tell you that he mumbles, "Damn girls' dorm is what it is," before lighting up a cigarette. In the kitchen. While people are eating breakfast. He may not be evil anymore, but he sure is inconsiderate! Dawn complains too and moves up a tiny notch in my estimation. Andrew decides that "it's time to do some introductions" and points the camera towards Millie. Millie starts to introduce herself, but Andrew's all, "Not you, sweetheart," because he wants to focus in on Buffy. Then our point of view switches to Nerd Fantasy Cam. The light in the kitchen is golden and Buffy floats by, pouring cereal into her bowl. Her hair blows around seductively in that sexy shampoo commercial way. Buffy turns to the camera and winks as Andrew describes her as "beautiful, with a lion's heart and the face of an angel." But not of Angel, because that would just be weird. I'm getting a whiff of old Beverly Hills 90210 off this tertiary character praise of the lead, so let's just move on. And move on quickly, because AAAAGH! Shirtless Spike! My eyes! The goggles do nothing! I know, it's a cliché at this point, but I just had to. Buffy and Spike move into an embrace as Andrew tells us, "You can feel the heat between them, although technically as a vam-pyre -- he's room temperature."
Then Anya glides into the frame, dangling a bunch of grapes over her mouth. She tongues one off the bunch and gets the following description: "A feisty waif with a fiery temper and a vulnerable heart that she hides even from herself." Andrew calling Anya a waif is quite pot 'n' kettle, isn't it? Andrew pans over to a miscellaneous Junior Miss, but then Buffy's griping knocks us out of Nerd Fantasy Cam and back into the kitchen.