Buffy the Vampire Slayer
What's My Line?, Part II

Episode Report Card
Couch Baron: B+ | 3 USERS: B
Bad Daddies And Bondage Fun

Okay, buckle up, kids. We're about to go on the Great American Scream Machine of Couch Baron rants. Deep breath. First of all, no one on the show has ever, to the best of my knowledge, explained what exactly it means when a Slayer is "called." I think, however, from what we've seen, it's reasonable to conclude that it refers to some sort of mystical transference whereby the new Slayer receives her strength and whatever other skills come with the package. Fine. Now, apparently, as Kendra and the current SiTs indicate, the Watcher's Council gets information, from whatever mystical or magical source, as to the identities of "potential" Slayers, and assigns these girls Watchers as soon as they're known. However, as Buffy's example indicates, the Council doesn't get wind of all the potentials. So here's where I channel Rico from Six Feet Under and say: What the fucking fuck? I mean, what sort of mystical information source would give the Council dozens of names of "potential" Slayers and not include a certain Buffy Summers, who actually became a Slayer, on the list? I'd be willing to accept grudgingly that the Council might find these girls based on their having some advanced fighting abilities, if no magical sources were available. However, since they clearly state in this episode that Kendra was found when she was too young even to remember her parents, can anyone explain by what means they could have done so other than magic? And if they're using magic to locate girls of such a young age, does anyone have a reasonable explanation (besides lazy writing) of how some girls slip through their fingers? I don't mean an elaborate fanwank -- that won't cut the mustard, although one may exist. But can anyone simply and logically reconcile all the pieces of the mythology we've seen? Yeah, that's what I thought. And I wasn't anywhere near as bothered by the sloppy and inconsistent storytelling in earlier seasons as I am in the current one. Why? Because the Slayer mythology is crucial to the plot of every single fucking recent episode. And please don't tell me that this is all neatly explained in the Watcher's Guide, or some Joss interview, or any other such nonsense, because I should be able to make some sort of sense of it by, you know, watching the show.

Continuity: Wow, you're really bent out of shape about this, huh?
Couch Baron: Well, what do you expect? You used to give a shit about this show.
Continuity: Now, I realize it may be hard to believe, but everything's going to be wrapped up in an explanation that makes sense. I swear on all that's good and holy.
Couch Baron: Well, that's a huge relief. Shake on it?
Continuity: Uh, what?
Couch Baron: A handshake, to seal the deal.
Continuity: Er, I really don't think that's necessary. How about I just give you a hearty thumbs-up?
Couch Baron: I knew it. Continuity is dead, and you're the First Evil.
Morphy!Continuity: Well, congratulations, you figured it out. I'm surprised you didn't shake your fist at the sky and yell, "You bastards! You killed Continuity!"
Couch Baron: Do you ever shut up?

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Buffy the Vampire Slayer




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