That was fun! Bonkers and weird, of course, but more fun than weird, at least.
Fanny blows back into town with her long-term honey at her side: Michael, a jazz pianist who takes an instant fatherly shine to Michelle, even at her worst. Their arrangement has been self-consciously casual ever since Hubbell tantrumed them out of getting married thirty years ago, but the change in Fanny -- overall, but particularly toward Michelle herself -- is so noticeable that soon Michelle's agitating for a more permanent arrangement. It's not surprising, given Fanny's bohemian mythology she has about herself, that Michael assumed she wasn't up for that, but thanks -- for once -- to Michelle's meddling, perhaps they can settle down a bit more in days to come.
One of the many sweet moments Fanny tosses Michelle's way this week -- odd, isn't it, that the character development so often comes in the absence of the actual characters on this show -- is an invite to see a play, just the two of them, in the city. There, after unending drama about nothing whatsoever, Michelle meets Connor (Chris Eigeman), the play's director, who you may remember from every other role Chris Eigeman has ever played. Meaning that he's off-putting and anachronistic about dumb things, and thus perfect for Michelle.
After some truly shocking sex talk from Fanny, Michelle goes on a date with the guy and they end up in bed together, which knocks loose some kind of PTSD Hubbell Grief Syndrome thing in her head and she goes apeshit on him, in a truly amazing fashion. It's probably the best non-Bishop scene we've ever had on the show, and I hope they keep Eigeman around forever and ever because he's even better than Bishop at making old Michelle shine.
As far as the Bunheads, Sasha's continuing revolt means Boo will take her place as the lead in some show about Ginger Rogers. We also lose Sasha's cutie-pie/a-hole partner Jordan, in favor of the adorable Carl. Boo, going with the herd as usual, is negative about Carl in every single way, and as soon as he's won his way into her heart, Ginny and Melanie chase him out again. But I wouldn't worry about it: They're gonna kiss next week. Meanwhile, Sasha's mental breakdown reaches its zenith when she puts blue stripes in her hair and goes out for cheerleading, causing Fanny to nearly deck her, which is where the episode abruptly ends, of course, before we even get to see the Fred & Ginger dance, but at this point that's small potatoes I guess.
Next Week: Godot hits on Michelle, who takes another date with Digger; Carl kisses Boo and possibly there is a carnival or festival of some sort; and maybe the show actually starts? Just kidding on that last one. Two more episodes to go, ya Bunhead.
You ready? I said, You Ready?! I wanna hear you SCREAM! YEAH! LET'S BUNHEAD!
Sasha's losing her mind in a fairly obvious way, but unluckily all of the adults around her have it even less together than she does. Boo's mother Nanette is now outsourcing her gross feeder tactics to anybody, including grown-ass women like Michelle. Fanny's finally coming back to town after a two-week hiatus intended to get Michelle stuck teaching at the ballet school, even though Fanny simultaneously doesn't even want her there. Michelle, Truly and Boo are all trainwrecks. It was, and continues to be, the weirdest show ever to air on television, with the very most words per square inch and a disinterest in reality bordering on the imperious.
Ginny and Melanie, those irrepressible cyphers, are chillin' on the back steps to the dressing room playing with their phones before class.
Melanie: "God, we are helicoptered and overscheduled. First ballet, now a leadership conference at school."
Ginny: "I know it well. Pete from Pete's Pizza gives a rousing speech on the meaning of punctuality."
Boo: "No big deal, just continuing to look amazing. Hey, I brought these flowers for Fanny. Fanny Flowers for Fanny Flowers."
Bunheads: "Clearly they are from the freeway. Look at all that baby's breath! Parsley of the flower world. Christ, you're poor."
Boo: "Isn't it the thought that counts?"
Bunheads: "Did you mom shove that crap into your face? Along with snacks?"
Bunheads: "Once a girl brought Fanny Flowers Fanny Flowers with too much baby's breath and Fanny trained dogs to murder her entire family."
Random Bunhead: "I brought Fanny Flowers Fanny Flowers! From a grocery store."
...And scene. Gettin' right in there, I see. Without so much as a la-la-la.
Michelle is foraging once again. But the kitchen contains a surprise this morning: a black man!
Michelle: "What are you doing here?"
Black Man: "Here in this kitchen? Or in Paradise?"
Michelle: "On this show!"
Black Man: "Fanny hides her seasonings behind the sandwich bags. So now you know. I'm going to make eggs with cayenne pepper, and then I'm going to eat them."
Michelle: "This is the weirdest robbery. Why are you wearing a dressing gown, Black Man?"
Black Man: "I think you mean, How do you do, my name is Michelle. My name is Michael. I am Fanny's side piece."