Blank Up, It's Time

Episode Report Card
Jacob Clifton: A+ | Grade It Now!
I Have [sic] Living

Melanie: "Boo, have you given any thought to how Sasha is going to murder you? She was already pretty Black Swan before you took her Ginger Rogers..."
Ginny: "-- Now she's DefCon Swan."
Melanie: "This is boring. Your life is boring."

For a second Boo actually thinks that Sasha is literally hiding in her locker. She's tiny, but nobody's that stupid.


Michelle is shocked that Fanny is bringing a glass of wine into the theater, and then a random woman is a bitch to her for no reason about getting to her seat, so Michelle turns it into a huge fucking deal that goes on for like ten minutes. Between this and the whole game of five-dimensional Jenga Boo had to play at the movie truck, it's a mystery to me that anyone associated with this show has ever been able to find seating of any kind. Or maybe it's just that when you're awful to be around, everything really is this hard. I wouldn't know, because I am a delight.

Michelle: "Hey, let's do a whole post-mortem on how long it took me to get to my seat. That sounds like a conversation people would have, right?"
Fanny: "Right you are."

Fanny's glass of wine has become a completely different beverage, which Michelle sneaks while she bitches about "matinee crowds" and how they're shittier than real crowds, and finally Fanny just tells her to shut up and read her program. I thought it was Paradise that made people act so goddamn shitty toward each other, but I guess this is a thing that Michelle takes with her everywhere. Seems like a burden.

Fanny: "I know one of the assistant costumers here! Good for her."
Michelle: "How was your first class back? Was Sasha a total blank?"
Fanny: "Yeah, for the last three years. I even cut her from a dance."
Michelle: "Oh blank, Nutcracker?"
Fanny: "No way, she's actually necessary for that. Now blank up, it's starting."
Michelle: (Aims just one last blanky comment at the lady down the row.)


Boo: "Hey, Sasha. I'm wearing my most horrific pleated mom jeans as penance. Although frankly, knowing my only real accomplishments are handed to me as a punishment for your behavior is gross enough on its own."

She sets down a special treat for the pleasantly pleasant Sasha: A brownie on which she's put a topping of whipped cream, crushed cherries and Tabasco sauce. Two more episodes of this.

Previous 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11Next





Get the most of your experience.
Share the Snark!

See content relevant to you based on what your friends are reading and watching.

Share your activity with your friends to Facebook's News Feed, Timeline and Ticker.

Stay in Control: Delete any item from your activity that you choose not to share.

The Latest Activity On TwOP