Sasha is summoned downstairs and the young ladies chat about how the dad is in love with a man named Timothy, who is moving out of town. Someone knocks on the door, and the girls all scream their heads off, because they don't know what a door is. Someone named Josh lets himself into the room, and everybody pretends that he's a character on this show.

Josh: "Why were you so scared?"
Girls: "We thought you were Sasha."
Josh: "Why are you scared of Sasha? Oh, right."
Ginny: "Oh, my boyfriend Josh. The redhead. Who now has black hair."

Did I make up the ginger part? Redheaded vegetarian? Why would I make that up? I mostly date redheaded vegetarians, it's true, but I don't think that's it. I would never ever date a Josh. Those guys are trouble. And besides, I can tell the difference between myself and Ginny from Bunheads with near-unerring accuracy.

...EW! But of all Joshes, this one is the worst. He has brought four pink giftbags filled with girls-night crap, which he lists -- "cucumber eyemasks, pop 'em in the freezer" -- and it's all very confusing and horrible, and then Sasha reappears and demands her giftbag, and everybody gushes about how great a boyfriend Josh is. I guess teenage girls really do just want to date gay guys. I guess that's a real thing. I can barely do it, so I guess somebody had to.

Sasha pushes her pain way down, and gets the girls motivated.

SPARKLES

Truly: "I look like a hooker!"
Michelle: Calls her like a dog.

Truly is, of course, dressed like a woman for once. She looks gorgeous, of course.

Truly: "Are you sure you're not hazing me?"
Talia: "You look so pretty!"
Truly: "Thanks, whatever, but Michelle? I really need your approval right now."
Michelle: "Meh."
Truly: "Okay, fine. I'm still desperate and excited! Your pointlessly aggressive and continuous mistreatment of me doesn't cause a single eyelash to bob. I guess it's true what they say, I know what's best for everybody but myself."

I thought she was the Sookie but it might be worse than that. She's not the Lane by any stretch, but she may well be the Kirk. Or some unholy admixture of the two. The only thing worse than Sookie would be extra Sookie, or a Sookie-Kirk hybrid. Kookie. Ugh.