Charlie and Boo are adorable and funny laughing about the movie, because away from his sister I guess he thinks Boo is cool, and the showgirls assemble at the back of the movie carnival thing truck. Truly shows them her stolen bottle of Gypsy's booze, and they all scream "WOO!" for no reason, and Michelle talks through the whole movie. These Girls! They're Going Wild!

Suddenly in the middle of the movie, Sasha realizes (?) that they have to go back home because retroactively the house alarm was always going to go off in the middle of this movie (?) so she chumps on up to get Boo out of there. I remember things like this being a logistical nightmare as a kid, sure, but at least I had time and space on my side. Not so in Paradise, where bank accounts grow and shrink at whim and people fuck during their own misguided bridal showers and sometimes food makes you fat but other times it doesn't and sometimes the clock runs backwards and you end up having to wipe your chola eyebrows off on a baby.

Michelle? Still talking through the movie. And still drinking. Eventually, the Bunheads notice that Michelle is back there, a few feet away, drunkenly babbling.

Sasha: "I don't know if Michelle is regular cool or like narc-cool, but either way she can't see us at this movie! Now, remember a second ago when I said we had to go straight back to my house or the cops would come? Forget that, no longer the issue. Now, we have to watch the whole movie with Michelle standing a few feet away. That way, she won't notice us."
Girls: "We're cool with just doing whatever you say."

AFTER THE MOVIE

Mel spots Boo, who is sitting alone at a picnic table, just as she's getting attacked by Michelle screaming drunkenly about the movie, but before they can drag her home Charlie shows up and writes a number on her hand. Whose number? Some girl. See, he wants her to text him the number when she gets home.

You know, like how guys are always doing that after a movie date? Writing information on you? Always doin' that.

DRUNK DRIVING

Michelle realizes she shouldn't drive when they find her car, so they talk about taking off their clothes and sleeping in the car, but Truly is not having it. Then this happens

Truly: "Cupcake ATM! In Los Angeles there is a pink ATM that dispenses all kinds of cupcakes 24 hours a day!"